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Old 12-20-2014, 6:38am   #1
island14
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bilmem WTF!!! 'Swiss Cheese Pervert'


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'Swiss Cheese Pervert' Masturbating With Dairy Products And Harassing Women In Philadelphia Say Police

Philadelphia police are hunting for a man who drives around without any trousers and offers women money to watch him masturbate with slices of cheese.

The so-called 'Swiss Cheese Pervert' has approached a number of women in the Mayfair area, prompting the police's Special Victims Unit to investigate.

A post on the Facebook page of Mayfair Town Watch said: "Good Morning Mayfair! Please be aware of the Swiss Cheese Pervert! This individual is driving around surrounding communities and exposes himself to women.



"He offers them money to watch him put swiss cheese on his privates. He is a white, heavy set male, 40-50 years old. He drives a newer model silver sedan.

"He was also spotted in a black newer model sedan. If you see this guy, don't confront him. Get his plate number and call 911 immediately!!! We have passed all the information to the 15th PD."

Other reports claim the same man has been sending messages on OKCupid asking women to "perform masturbation on him with cheese".

The Philadelphia Daily News obtained what is alleged to be an excerpt from one of those messages.

Quote:
"I started to compare girls to cheese due to their milky complections [sic], girls are soft, smooth feeling and tend to like dairy products more. That and typical advertising, always using a girl to advertise dairy products. So cheese is what I started to use as a replacement for having sex with girls."
Authorities are keen to point out that although the incidents may initially appear comical, it is in fact a serious offence and traumatic for those unfortunate to be approached.

'Swiss Cheese Pervert' Masturbating With Dairy Products And Harassing Women In Philadelphia Say Police
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Old 12-20-2014, 6:52am   #2
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Old 12-20-2014, 7:16am   #3
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Not even gonna ask what you were looking for when you found this gem!!
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Old 12-20-2014, 7:18am   #4
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That guy looks like Porky Pig.
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Old 12-20-2014, 7:41am   #5
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That guy looks like Porky Pig.
So-so-so-so-so-sonofabich!
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Old 12-20-2014, 8:07am   #6
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Old 12-20-2014, 8:15am   #7
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That's a Utah quality picture, right there!
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Old 12-20-2014, 8:28am   #8
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Is he an ex-carny?
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Old 12-20-2014, 8:36am   #9
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Swiss cheese is the perfect replacement. Flip it over and there's always another hole
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Old 12-20-2014, 8:52am   #10
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News must be slow to get to you. I believe he was caught several months ago ( was on the news alot out here. )
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Old 12-20-2014, 9:26am   #11
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Authorities are keen to point out that although the incidents may initially appear comical, it is in fact a serious offence and traumatic for those unfortunate to be approached.
Traumatic? Maybe if I hurt myself from laughing too hard.
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Old 12-20-2014, 9:29am   #12
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Monterey Jack.
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Old 12-20-2014, 9:30am   #13
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No whey.
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Old 12-20-2014, 9:47am   #14
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I guess this is OK, as long as he is paying a $ 15/hr minimum wage to the women he offers jobs to. I wonder if he is offering a health insurance plan, too?

Hey Hillary, this is a private employer creating jobs. How about them cheese slices?
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Old 12-20-2014, 9:54am   #15
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I've never seen holes in Swiss cheese that would be big enough........
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Old 12-20-2014, 10:18am   #16
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"Swiss Cheese Pervert" Pleads Guilty to Indecent Exposure Charges | NBC 10 Philadelphia
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Old 12-20-2014, 10:44am   #17
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News must be slow to get to you. I believe he was caught several months ago ( was on the news alot out here. )

Yup...
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Old 12-20-2014, 10:48am   #18
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I guess this is OK, as long as he is paying a $ 15/hr minimum wage to the women he offers jobs to. I wonder if he is offering a health insurance plan, too?

Hey Hillary, this is a private employer creating jobs. How about them cheese slices?
I just hope he doesn't work in a sandwich shop...
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Old 12-20-2014, 4:48pm   #19
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Just don't knock it if you haven't tried it.
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Old 12-20-2014, 5:05pm   #20
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What a muenster. Cheese whiz. Parmesan me but that's just whey wrong.
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