Choose your color scheme:
The Vette Barn  
 
Go Back   The Vette Barn > Off Topic/Babes/Other > Off Topic

Off Topic Off Topic - General non-Corvette related discussion.

User Tag List

Reply
 
Share Thread Tools
Old 10-27-2018, 12:47pm   #1
lspencer534
Dorkapottamus
Barn Stall Owner #52
Points: 198,355, Level: 100
Activity: 2.6%
 
lspencer534's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Here
Posts: 32,576
Thanks: 2,167
Thanked 20,193 Times in 6,716 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $9339376
Default Joke...

A woman passed her daughter's room and heard a strange buzzing noise. Opening the door, she saw her daughter using a vibrator. Shocked, she asked, "Why???".

The daughter replied, "Mom, I'm thirty-five-years old, unmarried, and this thing is as close as I'll ever get to a husband. So, please, leave me alone."

The next day, the father heard the same sound; upon entering his daughter's room, he saw the same scene. To his query, his daughter again said, "Dad, I'm thirty-five, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I will ever get to a husband. Please, leave me alone."

A couple of days later the wife came home from shopping and heard that buzzing noise coming from the living room.

Upon entering she saw her husband sitting on the couch, sipping a cold beer and staring at the TV. Thr vibrator was next to him on the couch, buzzing like crazy.

"Wat the Hell are you doing?!?".

The husband replied, "I'm watching some football with my son-in-law....".
lspencer534 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to lspencer534 For This Useful Post:
Old 10-27-2018, 12:48pm   #2
04 commemorative
A Real Barner
Points: 49,865, Level: 100
Activity: 31.9%
 
04 commemorative's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Down the Shore,New Jersey
Posts: 10,570
Thanks: 1,977
Thanked 4,536 Times in 2,283 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $1007122
Default

funny
04 commemorative is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-27-2018, 11:45pm   #3
Wathen1955
A Real Barner
Points: 28,248, Level: 100
Activity: 14.7%
 
Wathen1955's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Woodland, CA
Posts: 8,936
Thanks: 5,041
Thanked 4,038 Times in 1,453 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $1523780
Default

Some of these are probably old, but what the hell...

A tourist goes to an Indian reservation to visit the local Indians. As he passes one tee-pee, he see an Indian sitting down saying "chance", "chance", to all the women passing by him. Puzzled by this, the tourist approaches the Indian and asks, "don't Indians say how?" The Indian replies, "me know how, just want chance."

Why to rodeo cowboys make such lousy lovers? Because they think three seconds is a good ride!

How do find a old man in a nudist colony? It isn't hard.

What can a bird do that a man cannot? Eat with his pecker!

Definition of trust: Two cannibals having oral sex.

BOOK TITLES

1. Under the Grandstand by Seymour Butts
2. Brown Spots on the Wall by Who-Flung-Dung
3. How to Fish by Captain Blue Balls
4. Antlers in the Tree Tops by Who-Goosed-The Moose
5. The Gas Station by Who-Pumped-Ethyl
6. Balls in the Mattress by Mister Completely

A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?" "Of course not, dear." replied the mother, "Why would you think that?" "The tombstone back there said 'Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.'"

While doing a vasectomy, the doctor slipped and cut off one of the man's balls. To avoid a huge malpractice suit, he decides to replace the missing ball with an onion. Several weeks later, the patient returned for a checkup. "How's your sex life?" the doctor asked. "Pretty good," the man said, to the doctor's relief. But then he added, "I've had some strange side effects." "What's that that?" the doctors asked anxiously. "Well, every time I piss, my eyes water. When my wife gives me a blow job, she gets heartburn. And
every time I pass a hamburger stand, I get a hard-on."
Wathen1955 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-28-2018, 6:03am   #4
Black'95
Barn Stall Owner #102
Points: 8,602, Level: 64
Activity: 1.5%
 
Black'95's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Roscoe, South Dakota
Posts: 1,015
Thanks: 431
Thanked 392 Times in 186 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $403719
Default

You missed a couple of Book Titles:
Russian Love by Tora Titoff
The Amber Stream by I.P. Standing
The China Problem by Won Hung Lo
Black'95 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

The Vette Barn > Off Topic/Babes/Other > Off Topic


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 4:53pm.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
User Alert System provided by Advanced User Tagging (Pro) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2020 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
Copyright 2009 - 2020 The Vette Barn


Support the Barn:
 
Download the Mobile App;
 
Follow us on Facebook:

Become a Stall Owner

 

Apple iOS App        Google Android App

 

Visit our Facebook page