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Off Topic Off Topic - General non-Corvette related discussion. |
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04-20-2021, 8:04am | #1 | ||||||
Latin American Goat Roper
Barn Stall Owner #101 Bantayan Kids '13
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Southern Cops Say.......
Southern Cops Say
T hose Southerners have a way with words! These are actual comments made by South Carolina Troopers that were taken off their car videos: 1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through." 2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while." 3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document." (My Favorite) 4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired." 5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you." (LOVE IT) 6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?" 7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?" 8. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket." 9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?" 10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop" 11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven." 12. "In God we trust; all others we run through NCIC" ( National Crime Information Center ) 13. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had?" 14. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can." 15. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail." AND THE WINNER IS.... 16. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here." |
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04-20-2021, 8:19am | #2 | |||||||
Chief Meat Gazer
Charter Member Barn Stall Owner #98 Barn Raising II,III,IV
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Ohio
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04-20-2021, 8:50am | #3 | ||||||
Barn Raising II,III
NCM Supporter '13 Bantayan Kids '17
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Location: I could never live there.
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Always good for a laugh!
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04-20-2021, 10:01am | #4 | ||||||
Chief Meat Gazer
Charter Member Barn Stall Owner #98 Barn Raising II,III,IV
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Ohio
Posts: 51,040
Thanks: 23,455
Thanked 33,861 Times in 12,340 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $5135124
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The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Mike Mercury For This Useful Post: |
04-20-2021, 1:08pm | #5 | |||||||
Barn Stall Owner #1
Barn Raising I, II NCM Supporter '11, '12
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Quote:
He and his partner and I started to laugh. We joked about it for a few minutes and I went on my way. It was a legit ticket so I wasn't pissed. |
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04-20-2021, 4:47pm | #6 | |||||||
Latin American Goat Roper
Barn Stall Owner #101 Bantayan Kids '13
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Orange Park Florida
Posts: 60,710
Thanks: 32,894
Thanked 11,561 Times in 5,701 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $1138393
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Quote:
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04-20-2021, 5:38pm | #7 | ||||||
Barn Raising II
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Central Ohio
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Gameroom Barn Bucks: $610770
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We don't have a quota. We can write as many tickets as we want
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