|
Off Topic Off Topic - General non-Corvette related discussion. |
|
Share | Thread Tools | Search this Thread |
03-12-2012, 5:00pm | #1 | ||||||
A Real Barner
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: The Unkn0wn !
Posts: 3,337
Thanks: 690
Thanked 743 Times in 387 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $2329324
|
And the winners are ???
The Darwins are out!
Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the DarwinAwards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us. Here is the glorious winner: 1. When his 38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up inLong Beach, Californiawould-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked. And now, the honorable mentions: 2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved. 3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her. 4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days. 5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit. 6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer... $15, which begs the question: If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed? 7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly.. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape. 8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from." 9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King inYpsilanti, Michigan at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast... The man, frustrated, walked away.[*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER] 10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street by sucking on a hose, he got much more than he bargained for ...... Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline, but he plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had. In the interest of bettering mankind, please share these with friends and family....unless of course one of these individuals by chance is a distant relative or long lost friend. In that case, be glad they are distant and hope they remain lost. *** Remember...They walk among us, they reproduce. _ |
||||||
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Issues For This Useful Post: |
03-12-2012, 5:04pm | #2 | ||||||
Barn Stall Owner #2112
Fantasy Football Champ '14,'16,'20 Bantayan Kids '13
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: WHERE I LAY MY HEAD IS HOME - REHO BEACH DELAWARE
Posts: 42,419
Thanks: 6,373
Thanked 10,607 Times in 6,383 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $3043611
|
Good ones......
|
||||||
03-12-2012, 5:22pm | #3 |
Explosive Salami
Stall Owner #1120.2520 Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Not Ceasing & Desisting on the leeward side of Anger Island
Posts: 52,326
Thanks: 21,739
Thanked 27,928 Times in 11,805 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $9018209
|
Sucking raw sewage Now that's great. So, how many of these anecdotes are actually true?
|
03-12-2012, 5:25pm | #4 | ||||||
Sparkles Flambeaux
Barn Stall Owner #4 Barn Raising I,II NCM Supporter '13,'14,'15,'16,'17,'21 Bantayan Kids '13,'14,'15,'17
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Santa Fe, NM
Posts: 61,467
Thanks: 11,772
Thanked 33,024 Times in 14,164 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $17500122
|
|
||||||
03-12-2012, 5:32pm | #5 | ||||||
Vette Barn Crew
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 650
Thanks: 52
Thanked 238 Times in 96 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $1000003555
|
My favs are number 4 and number 10
|
||||||
03-12-2012, 5:36pm | #6 | ||||||
Barn Stall Owner #10
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Florida Keys
Posts: 6,625
Thanks: 363
Thanked 1,765 Times in 758 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $8563902
|
|
||||||
03-12-2012, 5:37pm | #7 | |||||||
Barn Stall Owner #89
Bantayan Kids '13
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Marietta, GA
Posts: 28,452
Thanks: 15,346
Thanked 6,760 Times in 3,415 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $536709986
|
Quote:
snopes.com: Gas Siphoner Gets Sewage |
|||||||
03-12-2012, 5:39pm | #8 | ||||||
Charter Member
Barn Stall Owner #5 Barn Raising I,II,III,IV NCM Supporter '11,'12,'13,'14,'16,'17,'19,'20,'21 Bantayan Kids '13
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Republic of Texas
Posts: 18,813
Thanks: 6,105
Thanked 5,436 Times in 2,935 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $2173478
|
|
||||||
03-12-2012, 5:40pm | #9 | |||||||
Sparkles Flambeaux
Barn Stall Owner #4 Barn Raising I,II NCM Supporter '13,'14,'15,'16,'17,'21 Bantayan Kids '13,'14,'15,'17
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Santa Fe, NM
Posts: 61,467
Thanks: 11,772
Thanked 33,024 Times in 14,164 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $17500122
|
Quote:
i did say 'supposedly'..... |
|||||||
03-12-2012, 5:41pm | #10 | ||||||
Barn Stall Owner #0
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 6,462
Thanks: 534
Thanked 1,878 Times in 918 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $1576624
|
Only thing I could find for #7???
This was back in 2006. |
||||||
The Following User Says Thank You to C5Nate For This Useful Post: |
|
|
Support the Barn: |
Download the Mobile App; |
Follow us on Facebook: |
||