Choose your color scheme:
The Vette Barn  
 
Go Back   The Vette Barn > Off Topic/Babes/Other > Off Topic

Off Topic Off Topic - General non-Corvette related discussion.

User Tag List

Reply
 
Share Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 07-11-2019, 1:49pm   #1
snide
Barn Raising II,III
NCM Supporter '13
Bantayan Kids '17
Points: 216,817, Level: 100
Activity: 53.6%
 
snide's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: I could never live there.
Posts: 339,934
Thanks: 200,281
Thanked 30,506 Times in 14,292 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $108033784
biggrin Lone Ranger and Tonto

The Lone Ranger and Tonto were camping in the wilderness. After they got their tent set up, both men fell sound asleep.

Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, “Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see?”

The Lone Ranger replies, “I see millions of stars”.

“What that tell you?” asked Tonto.

The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, “Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time-wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, the Lord is all powerful and we are small and insignificant.

Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you, Tonto?”

“You dumber than buffalo....it mean someone stole tent!”
snide is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to snide For This Useful Post:
Old 07-11-2019, 2:23pm   #2
DAB
Sparkles Flambeaux
Barn Stall Owner #4
Barn Raising I,II
NCM Supporter '13,'14,'15,'16,'17,'21
Bantayan Kids '13,'14,'15,'17
Points: 171,375, Level: 100
Activity: 7.2%
 
DAB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Santa Fe, NM
Posts: 61,433
Thanks: 11,767
Thanked 32,997 Times in 14,148 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $17500122
Default

same guy must have taken Holmes and Watson's tent.
DAB is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2019, 2:25pm   #3
Rob
Administrator
Barn Stall Owner #14
Barn Raising II,III Chef

NCM Supporter '11,'12,'13,'14,'15,'16,'17,'20
Bantayan Kids '13,'14,'15,'17
Ukranian Famers are the modern day Chuck Norris
Points: 82,767, Level: 100
Activity: 5.8%
 
Rob's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: between here and there
Posts: 25,050
Thanks: 9,360
Thanked 14,303 Times in 5,470 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $17601606
Default

Tonto and Lone Ranger were riding through the wilderness when they stopped to take a leak.

Once they finished, Tonto leaned over and put his ear to the ground.

Lone Ranger said "What is it Tonto?"

Tonto Replied "Buffalo come"

Lone Ranger said "You can hear them?"

Tonto replied "No, ear sticky"
Rob is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Rob For This Useful Post:
Old 07-11-2019, 2:43pm   #4
DAB
Sparkles Flambeaux
Barn Stall Owner #4
Barn Raising I,II
NCM Supporter '13,'14,'15,'16,'17,'21
Bantayan Kids '13,'14,'15,'17
Points: 171,375, Level: 100
Activity: 7.2%
 
DAB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Santa Fe, NM
Posts: 61,433
Thanks: 11,767
Thanked 32,997 Times in 14,148 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $17500122
Default

Lone Ranger and Tonto see a band of attacking braves coming toward them.

LR says, "we better get ready"

T says, "what's this WE stuff white man?"
DAB is online now   Reply With Quote
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to DAB For This Useful Post:
Old 07-11-2019, 7:04pm   #5
Wathen1955
A Real Barner
Points: 46,455, Level: 100
Activity: 9.0%
 
Wathen1955's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Woodland, CA
Posts: 12,421
Thanks: 7,688
Thanked 5,566 Times in 1,973 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $1524159
Default

A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane...
He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat … As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his.
Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, ” Business trip or pleasure?”
She turned, smiled and said, “” Business. I’m going to the Annual Nympho- maniacs of America Convention in Boston .”
He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs.
Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, “What’s your business role at this convention?”
” Lecturer,” she responded. ” I use information that I have learned from my personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.”
“Really?” he said. ” And what kind of myths are there?”
“Well,” she explained,” one popular myth is that African-American men are the most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Jewish descent who are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck.”
Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. ” I’m sorry,” she said, ” I shouldn’t really be discussing all of this with you. I don’t even know your name…”
“Tonto,” the man said, “Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me Bubba.”
Wathen1955 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Wathen1955 For This Useful Post:
Old 07-12-2019, 2:27pm   #6
Mike Mercury
Chief Meat Gazer
Charter Member
Barn Stall Owner #98
Barn Raising II,III,IV
Points: 157,560, Level: 100
Activity: 20.9%
 
Mike Mercury's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Ohio
Posts: 50,740
Thanks: 23,242
Thanked 33,735 Times in 12,291 Posts
Gameroom Barn Bucks: $5135124
Default

Mike Mercury is online now   Reply With Quote
Reply

The Vette Barn > Off Topic/Babes/Other > Off Topic


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 1:04pm.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
User Alert System provided by Advanced User Tagging (Pro) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2024 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
Copyright © 2009 - 2024 The Vette Barn


Support the Barn:
 
Download the Mobile App;
 
Follow us on Facebook:

Become a Stall Owner

 

Apple iOS App        Google Android App

 

Visit our Facebook page