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Old 07-13-2019, 02:42pm   #1
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Default The scarred for life column...

Or maybe I should file this under the what the hell is going on here column. Short back story. My youngest son and I rode up to the Harley store to get a battery today. On the way home, not too far out of the way, is where an old family friend lives, so I decided to just stop and say hi. His wife had passed several months ago, so I thought it would be a good thing to do. Anyway, his son lets my son and I in, and a smell that would have made a buzzard puke, met me about 10 inches inside the door. Mind you, he is in his 70's, and his son in his 50's, but something has gone wrong with those two. They had a pack of dogs running around inside the house, and literally, the whole house was full of dog piss and shit. I have never in my life...I was only in there until I could be polite and tell him I wanted to look at something outside, which was only a minute or so, but I am still hoping I didn't catch some kind of disease in there. I swear, words cannot express the foulness and filth. I'm pretty sure my son is now dealing with PTSD!! Literally the house probably needs to be burnt down and filled in. My buddy's son has had numerous strokes, and is not right by any stretch, but I never would expected anyone I know to live like this. WTFO
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Old 07-13-2019, 05:24pm   #2
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you need to call the local police and have them do a wellness check. With the conditions you're describing, you'll probably save their lives.
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Old 07-13-2019, 05:30pm   #3
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you need to call the local police and have them do a wellness check. With the conditions you're describing, you'll probably save their lives.
My first thoughts exactly.
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Old 07-13-2019, 05:59pm   #4
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Down here in Jax Fl. years ago, I had a service call for some dishwasher work, and the old lady was stone out of it, with a whole large house full of cats....and the joint was a health hazard......

a few weeks later that house/her made the news......nuff said.....
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Old 07-13-2019, 06:32pm   #5
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you need to call the local police and have them do a wellness check. With the conditions you're describing, you'll probably save their lives.
I really feel like doing that, but on the other hand, I don't want to cause him any more problems than he is dealing with. That said, someone needs to do something.
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Old 07-13-2019, 06:42pm   #6
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I really feel like doing that, but on the other hand, I don't want to cause him any more problems than he is dealing with. That said, someone needs to do something.
I don't really see how getting the police involved is going to help the situation. Police generally make things worse. Once someone gets stuck in the maw of the legal system, that just adds to their woes. Is there any other family they have that could be contacted? Friends? Neighbors? A church family?

Failing all that, are YOU close enough to have a heart to heart with your friend and tell him you think he's got a problem and are offering to help? Are there just too many animals there? Maybe the local SPCA could be of help? They are used to dealing with hoarding situations.


I would think a situation like this would be ideal for a volunteer group, like a church group, to help with. The house would have to be cleaned out, flooring ripped out, baseboards ripped out, walls and ceilings painted with Kilz primer then painted, furniture cleaned.....basically like redoing a flood house.

Sometimes people get overwhelmed with life and just kind of shut down. This sounds like what has happened to your friend.
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Old 07-13-2019, 06:45pm   #7
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I really feel like doing that, but on the other hand, I don't want to cause him any more problems than he is dealing with. That said, someone needs to do something.
Is there a church he goes or went to? Something needs to be done before it literally kills him.
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Old 07-13-2019, 06:58pm   #8
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I don't really see how getting the police involved is going to help the situation. Police generally make things worse. Once someone gets stuck in the maw of the legal system, that just adds to their woes. Is there any other family they have that could be contacted? Friends? Neighbors? A church family?

Failing all that, are YOU close enough to have a heart to heart with your friend and tell him you think he's got a problem and are offering to help? Are there just too many animals there? Maybe the local SPCA could be of help? They are used to dealing with hoarding situations.


I would think a situation like this would be ideal for a volunteer group, like a church group, to help with. The house would have to be cleaned out, flooring ripped out, baseboards ripped out, walls and ceilings painted with Kilz primer then painted, furniture cleaned.....basically like redoing a flood house.

Sometimes people get overwhelmed with life and just kind of shut down. This sounds like what has happened to your friend.
Yeah, I'm not going to have a wellness check done. Since he didn't appear to be out of his mind, there is probably nothing they can do. I tried to call him, but he didn't answer. I promise, I am not making this out to be something it isn't. I would not go back in that house without a full on chem suit.
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Old 07-13-2019, 07:05pm   #9
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Believe me, I have seen shit like that.

With my wife's company (Petsitting), she deals with the full range of stuff like that all the time. You would not believe the way people live. And we are talking multi million dollar homes. You go to one house, and it's like Better Homes and Gardens, next house is like out of Deliverance...even WORSE. It's ****ing incredible how filthy some people are.

A lot of people have clutter, their houses look lived in, and that's fine. Others are OCD about having everything "Perfect", but I would say about 25% live in complete and utter disgusting filth. Dog shit, months old dirty dishes, inches of dust and cobwebs, bathrooms smell like urine and feces etc. It's just gross man.


GROSS!
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Old 07-13-2019, 07:23pm   #10
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Believe me, I have seen shit like that.

With my wife's company (Petsitting), she deals with the full range of stuff like that all the time. You would not believe the way people live. And we are talking multi million dollar homes. You go to one house, and it's like Better Homes and Gardens, next house is like out of Deliverance...even WORSE. It's ****ing incredible how filthy some people are.

A lot of people have clutter, their houses look lived in, and that's fine. Others are OCD about having everything "Perfect", but I would say about 25% live in complete and utter disgusting filth. Dog shit, months old dirty dishes, inches of dust and cobwebs, bathrooms smell like urine and feces etc. It's just gross man.


GROSS!
I promise, it was the worst I have seen outside of a tv show. I want to puke just thinking about it.
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Old 07-13-2019, 07:50pm   #11
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I promise, it was the worst I have seen outside of a tv show. I want to puke just thinking about it.
Don't worry. I believe you.

I'd invite you over if you were closer. My house is clean and smells pretty good.
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Old 07-14-2019, 03:45am   #12
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Don't worry. I believe you.

I'd invite you over if you were closer. My house is clean and smells pretty good.
My house smells ok too, long as you are upwind.....
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Old 07-14-2019, 04:38am   #13
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Self-neglect needs to be reported. https://aging.georgia.gov/abuse-negl...adults-georgia

Youíre saying itís so bad that you canít even stand inside...but youíre hedging about reporting it? Come on, man. If they could do better on their own, they would. But they canít. Even if you go over and clean it up, itíll go back to what it is now. He needs help. Step up and be the friend he needs you to be and get him help.
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Old 07-14-2019, 06:42am   #14
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Self-neglect needs to be reported. https://aging.georgia.gov/abuse-negl...adults-georgia

Youíre saying itís so bad that you canít even stand inside...but youíre hedging about reporting it? Come on, man. If they could do better on their own, they would. But they canít. Even if you go over and clean it up, itíll go back to what it is now. He needs help. Step up and be the friend he needs you to be and get him help.
Thing is, he isn't being abused. He told me that since his wife died, he just didn't feel like doing anything. Obviously, that includes not cleaning up dog mess. Funny thing is, from the outside of the house, you would never know anything was amiss. Grass is cut, and the mechanicals of the house are ok. It's just the inside. I just don't understand how anyone could deal with it. They could do better on their own, that is what I don't understand. My buddy isn't out of his mind at all. No dementia, etc.
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Old 07-14-2019, 08:04am   #15
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Thing is, he isn't being abused. He told me that since his wife died, he just didn't feel like doing anything. Obviously, that includes not cleaning up dog mess. Funny thing is, from the outside of the house, you would never know anything was amiss. Grass is cut, and the mechanicals of the house are ok. It's just the inside. I just don't understand how anyone could deal with it. They could do better on their own, that is what I don't understand. My buddy isn't out of his mind at all. No dementia, etc.
Thereís an entire section thatís lists self-neglect.

Stop making excuses. Do the right thing.

You say heís isnít out of his mind, but living like this is not normal. There are most definitely some mental health issues going on here. At the very least, heís probably suffering severe depression.

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Old 07-14-2019, 08:04am   #16
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Please make the call.
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Old 07-14-2019, 08:25am   #17
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Agreed on making a call or two. Things can't really get much worse unless someone dies.

I usually see this type of stuff when buying fixxer upper homes. The aftermath of some pretty jacked up living.

I've seen places that had more dog crap on the floor than actual flooring surface.
Another place, the carpet looked like a huge spider web until we realized it was mold from dog and cat turds.

One place was so bad the inspector got in the front door and just said "f-it" and told me "I'm not doing this one"
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Old 07-14-2019, 08:26am   #18
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Thereís an entire section thatís lists self-neglect.

Stop making excuses. Do the right thing.

You say heís isnít out of his mind, but living like this is not normal. There are most definitely some mental health issues going on here. At the very least, heís probably suffering severe depression.

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I agree about the depression, and feel like it is probably the root cause. And no, living like that is not normal by any stretch.
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Old 07-14-2019, 06:44pm   #19
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I agree about the depression, and feel like it is probably the root cause. And no, living like that is not normal by any stretch.
Make a call and save your friends
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Old 07-15-2019, 08:57pm   #20
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Self-neglect needs to be reported. https://aging.georgia.gov/abuse-negl...adults-georgia

Youíre saying itís so bad that you canít even stand inside...but youíre hedging about reporting it? Come on, man. If they could do better on their own, they would. But they canít. Even if you go over and clean it up, itíll go back to what it is now. He needs help. Step up and be the friend he needs you to be and get him help.
with NAV..
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