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Off Topic Off Topic - General non-Corvette related discussion. |
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04-02-2020, 3:35pm | #1 | ||||||
Barn Stall Owner #74
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The stimulus package explained
This explains it all.
Sometime this year, we taxpayers will likely receive another economic stimulus. It is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by using a Q&A format: Q: What is an Economic Stimulus? A: It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers. Q: Where will the government get this money? A: From taxpayers. Q: Is the government simply giving me back my own money, then? A: No, only a smidgen of it. Q: What is the purpose of this payment? A: The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high definition television set, a new iPad, or a new SUV, thus stimulating the economy. Q: Isn't that stimulating the economy of China? A: Shut up. Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U. S. Economy with your stimulus check. Use it wisely: * If you spend the stimulus money at Walmart the money will go to China or Sri Lanka. * if you spend it on gasoline, the money will go to the Arabs. * if you purchase a computer, it goes to India, Taiwan or China. * if you purchase fruits and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala. * if you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea. * if you purchase useless stuff, it goes to Taiwan. * if you pay your credit card off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore. Instead, keep the money in America by: (1) Spending it at a yard sale, or (2) Going to a ballgame, or (3) Spending it on prostitutes, or (4) Beer, or (5) Tattoos (These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S.) CONCLUSION: Go to a ballgame with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day. No need to thank me, I'm just glad to be of help. 😁. |
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04-02-2020, 3:38pm | #2 | ||||||
Sparkles Flambeaux
Barn Stall Owner #4 Barn Raising I,II NCM Supporter '13,'14,'15,'16,'17,'21 Bantayan Kids '13,'14,'15,'17
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guns and ammo?
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04-02-2020, 4:33pm | #3 | ||||||
10cm member
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Fail:
~ball games have been cancelled. |
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04-02-2020, 5:56pm | #4 | ||||||
A Real Barner
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What about local restaurants or fast food places?
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04-02-2020, 6:20pm | #5 | ||||||
A Real Barner
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04-02-2020, 7:13pm | #6 | ||||||
A Real Barner
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Not many "American" beer brands are still owned by Americans either.
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04-02-2020, 9:40pm | #7 | ||||||
A Real Barner
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I'm ahead of the game. I already did all of those things in some fun places around the world. Oh, yes I got paid to do it.
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04-03-2020, 2:02am | #8 | ||||||
Barn Stall Owner #13
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04-03-2020, 9:50am | #9 | ||||||
Chief Electrician
Barn Stall Owner #7734 Bantayan Kids '15
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I'm already at least 6 feet away from any females and some 200 feet away officially. I sure don't need to pay for it.
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