A few jokes from down unda.........

[Kerrmudgeon]

Auzzy funnies.......



Son said to Dad ''I'm Gay'' Dad looks at his other son and said ''What about you'' Other son said ''Me too Dad''. Dad said F*ck me doesn't anyone in this Frickin family like *****? The Daughter said ''I do''


10 Catholic Priests were killed in a road accident. At the Pearly Gates St Peter says '' If any of you are paedophiles' you can f**k off down to Hell'' 9 of them start to walk away when St Peter calls out ''And take this deaf bastard with you too''



In the Pub the other day I was telling that old joke about what do you do if you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath ? Answer. Throw in your washing. We were all having a good laugh about this when this big bastard tapped me on the shoulder and said '' I don’t find that very funny. My brother was an epileptic and he died in the bath during one of his fits'' I said '' Sorry mate did he drown'' No he said '' he choked on a sock ''

The wife said to me last night ''If you turn the bedside lamp off I'll take it up the arse. Maybe I should have waited for the bulb to cool down first.

My mate reckons he always cries after sex. Mind you....He is in Prison.

Nearly shagged a Ladyboy last night. Picked him up in a night club. He Looked like a woman. Smelled like a woman. Danced like a woman. Even kissed like a woman, but as we arrived back at his apartment he reversed his car into a tight parking slot in one fluid movement. That's when I thought ''Fkin hang about !!!!''

I saw my mate Charlie this morning, he's only got one arm bless him. I shouted ''Where you off to Charlie'' he said ''I'm off to change a light bulb'' Well I just cracked up, couldn't stop laughing. I said'' That's gonna be a bit awkward init''
''Not really'' He said.'' I still have the receipt you insensitive bastard''

[78SA]

[FasterTraffic]

Nicely done.

[73sbVert]

[Chuck A]

very funny, indeed