Anger Management help

[Aerovette]

Has anyone here actually had any anger management counseling or training or whatever? How did it work out? Did it actually make a difference?

I have trouble chilling out and since I don't smoke pot, I am considering seeing someone. Mind you, this is not physical anger. It is just general impatience and high level frustration with most things I encounter. Dumb people seem to get under my skin quickly as well as poor drivers ...

and most of the stuff my wife does

It sits inside and stews until I crack and then it is over the top.

It is a trait I don't like in myself and I want to fix it.

I am open to any advice.

(flame suit is on as well in case it goes that direction)

[lspencer534]

OP, unfortunately I have no answers to your questions, but I do want to say that it took a lot of bravery on your part to openly seek advice and help. My hat is off to you.

[VITE1]

I have no suggestions but offer you the best to luck in finding some inner peace.

[Kerrmudgeon]

Will she be at the meetings?

[Aerovette]

Originally Posted by lspencer534

OP, unfortunately I have no answers to your questions, but I do want to say that it took a lot of bravery on your part to openly seek advice and help. My hat is off to you.

I feel anything but brave, but thank you.

I feel like a failure because of the negative impact it has on my life. It is consuming.

[Nemesis]

Originally Posted by aerovette

Dumb people seem to get under my skin quickly as well as poor drivers ...

and most of the stuff my wife does

What makes you think you're so much better than everyone else?

[LATB]

10 Little Habits that Steal Your Happiness

[Chuck A]

good luck

[Norm]

I used to feel that way some years ago, everything got on my nerves. Well, I had the big one, quintuple bypass, yada, yada.

I have learned (and it is a learning process, self learning) to just don't sweat the inconsequential little shit. Look at the overall way things are and if you are OK financially, personal relationships, relatively good health, just enjoy life. Find things you like to do and pursue them.

This may not be any help but it has worked for me so far, main thing is overlooking the irritating little stuff, stuff that grates on you, you just have to dismiss it.

Good luck in whatever direction you go.

[Chuck A]

one thing you must know/remember people are a-ho-es, so if you learn and believe that you should do fine

[lspencer534]

OP, since no one else has offered any real suggestions, I have a few friends that had the same problem as you. They took anger management classes/therapy, and each one of them says that they became happier, less angry people. I do remember that one of them said that anger may be genetic or physiological and that family background plays a role.

You seem to already know what things irritate you--called "triggers"--and I'm sure a therapist could help you from there.

[VatorMan]

Exercise, exercise,exercise. I play volleyball almost every day. I imagine the face of who pisses me off on the ball and it helps tremendously.

[DAB]

i have learned that i can't control what others think or do, but i can control my reaction to them.

[CubSmurf]

Originally Posted by aerovette

Has anyone here actually had any anger management counseling or training or whatever? How did it work out? Did it actually make a difference?

I have trouble chilling out and since I don't smoke pot, I am considering seeing someone. Mind you, this is not physical anger. It is just general impatience and high level frustration with most things I encounter. Dumb people seem to get under my skin quickly as well as poor drivers ...

and most of the stuff my wife does

It sits inside and stews until I crack and then it is over the top.

It is a trait I don't like in myself and I want to fix it.

I am open to any advice.

(flame suit is on as well in case it goes that direction)

I don't have any counseling suggestions but I was in a similar situation for a while and realized it stemmed from bad work environment. I was unhappy where I was and had been looking for something new for a while without much success and it was draining me. I know you're concerned about your job status with all the O&G layoffs here in HOU. Could this be a big part of the problem?

Also, going to the gun range and blowing off steam really helped me too. FWIW

[Mike Mercury]

rubber band around wrist.

When feeling the anger/negativity... pull it away about 6 inches and let it snap you. For a split second you will have shifted away from the circumstance; and will create a new focus of your attention... putting things back into proper perspective.

serious

[Bill]

I have no serious suggestions, but, since laughter is the best medicine, I present the following solution (kids, don't try this at home).


Start riding the bus, and taking out the trash.

[Aerovette]

Originally Posted by lspencer534

OP, since no one else has offered any real suggestions, I have a few friends that had the same problem as you. They took anger management classes/therapy, and each one of them says that they became happier, less angry people. I do remember that one of them said that anger may be genetic or physiological and that family background plays a role.

You seem to already know what things irritate you--called "triggers"--and I'm sure a therapist could help you from there.

This without a doubt. I am my father.

[Fastguy]

Originally Posted by DAB

i have learned that i can't control what others think or do, but i can control my reaction to them.

Take this to heart. No one can make you feel angry but you. Granted it is way easier said then done, but I just don't let other people control me. If someone cut me off and then gave me the finger, it would really get under my skin until I realized they were winning, I was letting them do that to me.
Reading good books may help. I can see what I have in my library that has been beneficial.

The man who does not read is at the same disadvantage as the man who cannot read.

[Aerovette]

Originally Posted by Drew M

What makes you think you're so much better than everyone else?

Where do I begin?

I use my turn signal.
I don't park in handicapped spaces.
I don't toss my fast food crap out the window when I am done.
I don't let my dogs crap in other people's yards.
I don't blast my stereo at 3:00AM and rattle the windows.
I don't have a conversation about my kid's teacher in the middle of a movie.
I know when I have a shopping cart full of groceries that there are probably more than 10 items in it.
I know when I need a bulb for my truck, it does not require knowing the engine size and whether it is an automatic or not.



This does NOT make me better and I restricted my comment to intelligence and not whether I was "better". There are dumb people that are better than me and there are smart people that are worse than me. No correlation.

[island14]

You would not believe how pissed off I get some days at the retards I have to deal with now and then.

It's a good thing I don't act out on my angry pissed off fantasies... or they would call me Island Manson.