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Old 08-15-2013, 10:06am   #1
lspencer534
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Default Some Jewish humor...
A large predominantly Jewish neighborhood in New York built it's own community theater. One evening the neighborhood was enjoying a play at the theater. Suddenly, near the end of the play, the male lead collapsed on stage.

There were lots of doctors in the audience (of course), and they all rushed onto the stage to try to help the actor. The audience grows completely silent as the doctors take the man's vital signs and try to diagnose him. Suddenly there is a shout from a woman at the rear of the audience: "Give him an enema!".

The doctors ignore her and continue to try to help the man. The woman shouts again: "Give him an enema!". The man's condition deteriorates, and the woman again shouts, "Give him an enema!".

One of the doctors stands up and adresses the woman: "Ma'am, we're trying to help this man, and he's near death. Why do you thing that giving him an enema would help?".

"Vell, it vouldn't hurt...", she replied.
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Old 08-15-2013, 10:09am   #2
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Yeah, I missed that one...
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Old 08-15-2013, 10:12am   #3
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That's verklempt.
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Old 08-15-2013, 10:57am   #4
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I need some copper wire. I'm going to go to that neighborhood and drop a penny on the ground
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Old 08-15-2013, 1:06pm   #5
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That joke sucked.
Oy...you had to be there....
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Old 08-15-2013, 1:13pm   #6
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.....that's meshugeneh kop.
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Old 08-15-2013, 4:23pm   #7
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That joke sucked.
Sucked...
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Old 08-15-2013, 5:27pm   #8
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Relax and have some Jewish Whine. That's when the Princess cries "I want a mink coat!"
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Old 08-15-2013, 5:33pm   #9
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Don't get it.
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Old 08-15-2013, 5:39pm   #10
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Don't get it.
Me either.
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Old 08-15-2013, 5:42pm   #11
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Don't get it.
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Me either.
Baptists.
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Old 08-15-2013, 5:47pm   #12
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So Ot is in a thread when Spence collapses from failure. Knooger screams from the back, "I'll give him an enema."
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Old 08-15-2013, 6:12pm   #13
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Baptists.
I'm Baptist and I get it
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Old 08-15-2013, 6:18pm   #14
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I'm Baptist and I get it
You're a man of the world.
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Old 08-15-2013, 6:24pm   #15
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You're a man of the world.
Yes. Mars, so they tell me
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Old 08-15-2013, 6:45pm   #16
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Don't get it.
You've obviously never been around Jewish people very much. If you tell a Jewish mother that you haven't been felling well lately, she will work into the conservation, "So...how are your bowels?". Really. It doesn't matter if you have a pain in your arm or a splinter in your foot. In the traditional Jewish world (at least of stereotypes) the bowels are the root of all sicknesses and ills. And, "Vell, it vouldn't hurt" is another oft-repeated Jewish comment, whether it's having an enema for a headache or praying to [whomever] for forgiveness.

I'm not Jewish. Perhaps our Jewish brothers (with a sense of humor) can enlighten us more.
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Old 08-15-2013, 6:47pm   #17
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Originally Posted by TxAg View Post
That joke sucked.
Where is the demerit system when we need it?
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Old 08-15-2013, 6:48pm   #18
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You've obviously never been around Jewish people very much. If you tell a Jewish mother that you haven't been felling well lately, she will work into the conservation, "So...how are your bowels?". Really. It doesn't matter if you have a pain in your arm or a splinter in your foot. In the traditional Jewish world (at least of stereotypes) the bowels are the root of all sicknesses and ills. And, "Vell, it vouldn't hurt" is another oft-repeated Jewish comment, whether it's having an enema for a headache or praying to [whomever] for forgiveness.

I'm not Jewish. Perhaps our Jewish brothers (with a sense of humor) can enlighten us more.
Guess the topic never came up, or if it did, I forget.....but I have no such recollection from my Jewish friends over decades ago....
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Old 08-15-2013, 7:08pm   #19
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Guess the topic never came up, or if it did, I forget.....but I have no such recollection from my Jewish friends over decades ago....
Hmmm...memory loss. So...how are your bowels?
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Old 08-15-2013, 7:16pm   #20
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Hmmm...memory loss. So...how are your bowels?
I sat down and had a conversation with them, and I won the argument....


CASE OPENED!!!!!!!
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