Goodbye Linda.

[LATB]

I was doing some woodwork this afternoon (ripping and preparing boards for a screened porch project)

While working DAB came to mind, serious. I don't know why and I don't really know you sir.

Came inside a bit ago to cool down and read this thread. Teared up...well, because.

And it flushed out a piece of sawdust in my eye. Hey, thanks for that.

[Murray]

Originally Posted by bill_daniels

My Mom collected a small (very small) pension from my Dad's employer after Dad died.

Same with my MIL. FIL worked for the federal gov and when retiring, had a choice on pensions. He took the smaller one that kept paying her after he was gone. He’s been gone 9-10 yrs and she still collects

[DAB]

Originally Posted by LATB

I was doing some woodwork this afternoon (ripping and preparing boards for a screened porch project)

While working DAB came to mind, serious. I don't know why and I don't really know you sir.

Came inside a bit ago to cool down and read this thread. Teared up...well, because.

And it flushed out a piece of sawdust in my eye. Hey, thanks for that.

this thread is my biggest release of what i'm feeling and thinking. i can type away, pausing as needed, and tell you and everyone reading this, what i'm going thru, without having to wait for me to compose myself.

as noted elsewhere, we were married for 20 years this July, and that constituted over 1/3 of my life, so it was a big part of my life to date. we had a great marriage. never a harsh word (maybe a puzzled look now and then), and we loved each other immensely.

talking to my financial guy this morning, and then reading thru a book this PM, both touched on the question "will you marry again?"

i have no idea. i'm rather a hot mess presently, so i wouldn't even know where to look for a Godly woman who could compare to Linda. maybe in a year i'll give this idea more thought. i've told God, if you want me to have another woman in my life, you'll have to supply her, because I have no idea where to look.

just printing out some basic Probate info from the county website to take with me Wednesday when i'll see my lawyer dude (he did our wills many years ago). i plan to pay him to take care of the messy details. he knows what they are, let him fuss with it.

Linda made a difference in my life, in fact saving my life about 10 years ago when i had a bad heart (you're going to the ER! yes dear), and I believe I made a difference in her life. that's about all you can ask for.

no charge for the eye flush.

[JRD77VET]

Originally Posted by DAB

this thread is my biggest release of what i'm feeling and thinking. i can type away, pausing as needed, and tell you and everyone reading this, what i'm going thru, without having to wait for me to compose myself.

........../snip/.............

no charge for the eye flush.

Keep typing away as it is both beneficial for you and could help us later in life when we go thru the loss of a loved one.

[DAB]

Another thought, while I let dinner cook:

The whole reason I bought all these woodworking tools and learned how to use them was to please Linda. To build her things for our benefit and enjoyment. Sure, we could have just bought cabinets and furniture, but she believed that we could make better stuff and save some money.

She was right.

I’m a simple guy, I don’t need much. But I needed to please her.

What you do should have an end purpose beyond just making some money.

[DAB]

Quick request of Rob:

Can you merge this thread

https://www.thevettebarn.com/forums/...d.php?t=129216

With this ongoing thread, so everything is in one place please?

Thank you

[slewfoot]

Originally Posted by DAB

in other news, took the trash and recycles to the dump today. i can't smell, but the leaking liquid from one large trash bag in the garage was my clue that it probably smelled and was time to go. nasty.

see my lawyer next wednesday, go over her will and work on new will and powers of atty for me. need to find some responsible adults nearby.

also went on amazon and found some books that might help me going forward.

when we got married, i never thought i'd be referred to as a 'widower'....

My opinion, don't make a family member the executor unless they stand to inherit it all. My wife's mom passed a month ago. Home is in West Palm on a beach front canal.

My wife's brother is a multi-millionaire, and the executor and other sister is well off but with the brother running it, has turned into a real goatfuk. I told my wife this would happen years ago, and she may lawyer up

[dwjz06]

Originally Posted by DAB

this thread is my biggest release of what i'm feeling and thinking. i can type away, pausing as needed, and tell you and everyone reading this, what i'm going thru, without having to wait for me to compose myself.

as noted elsewhere, we were married for 20 years this July, and that constituted over 1/3 of my life, so it was a big part of my life to date. we had a great marriage. never a harsh word (maybe a puzzled look now and then), and we loved each other immensely.

talking to my financial guy this morning, and then reading thru a book this PM, both touched on the question "will you marry again?"

i have no idea. i'm rather a hot mess presently, so i wouldn't even know where to look for a Godly woman who could compare to Linda. maybe in a year i'll give this idea more thought. i've told God, if you want me to have another woman in my life, you'll have to supply her, because I have no idea where to look.

just printing out some basic Probate info from the county website to take with me Wednesday when i'll see my lawyer dude (he did our wills many years ago). i plan to pay him to take care of the messy details. he knows what they are, let him fuss with it.

Linda made a difference in my life, in fact saving my life about 10 years ago when i had a bad heart (you're going to the ER! yes dear), and I believe I made a difference in her life. that's about all you can ask for.

no charge for the eye flush.

You have time. Not the most pressing thing. I can answer NO without a doubt on the marriage part for me. Just finding a friend or something more would be nice. Take care of the grieving before the next phase of life. That and do not compare people. You had a great marriage. Just do the best you can.

[Olustee bus]

"Take care of the grieving before the next phase of life."

Very well said. One step at a time. I know you are Hurting Doug but I think you are doing well. Keep all you friends here in mind as you move through.

[69camfrk]

I am so sorry for your loss..

[DAB]

took a much needed break from sitting around the house and spent some time in the shop making a Gun Dump Box for the range. if the boys like it, i'll make another, this is a prototype based on inter web pictures i found.

the bottom folds in for storage, as does the leg assembly. no tools needed for set up or breakdown.

[DAB]

Two weeks today.

Funeral home called late yesterday, her remains are ready for pickup. So something to do this morning.

[Rodnok1]

Take someone with you Douglas, can't imagine it'll be an easy day.

[DAB]

Originally Posted by Rodnok1

Take someone with you Douglas, can't imagine it'll be an easy day.

I’ve got no one.

[Giraffe (He/Him)]

Originally Posted by DAB

I’ve got no one.

Speaking only for myself here, some things I have to do alone. I think this’d be one of them.

[Norm]

Or maybe call on your minister.

[Aerovette]

Originally Posted by DAB

Two weeks today.

Funeral home called late yesterday, her remains are ready for pickup. So something to do this morning.

It's a surreal experience. Prepare yourself for an aspect I was not ready for. The urn we chose was a very heavy marble urn for my dad and when they came with what amounts to a cloth shopping bag, it was a bit tough. To put someone you love so much into a carrying bag was a bit hard to take. You may have a different experience since you are making an urn. You may get a velvet bag. I am sorry for anyone going through this.

[Olustee bus]

I can only imagine.

[DAB]

Originally Posted by aerovette

It's a surreal experience. Prepare yourself for an aspect I was not ready for. The urn we chose was a very heavy marble urn for my dad and when they came with what amounts to a cloth shopping bag, it was a bit tough. To put someone you love so much into a carrying bag was a bit hard to take. You may have a different experience since you are making an urn. You may get a velvet bag. I am sorry for anyone going through this.

It’ll be a plain white corrugated box.

I’ll design and make a box later.

[DAB]

Just back from the most depressing place you can spend money at.

Her remains are back home.


Genesis 2:7 And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.

Genesis 3:19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.

Job 34:15 All flesh shall perish together, and man shall turn again unto dust.

Ecclesiastes 3:20 All go unto one place; all are of the dust, and all turn to dust again.

-----

Isaiah 40:5-8 -
5 And the glory of the LORD shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together: for the mouth of the LORD hath spoken it.
6 The voice said, Cry. And he said, What shall I cry? All flesh is grass, and all the goodliness thereof is as the flower of the field:
7 The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: because the spirit of the LORD bloweth upon it: surely the people is grass.
8 The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: but the word of our God shall stand for ever.

Matthew 19:4-6 -
4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female,
5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?
6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

Luke 3:6 And all flesh shall see the salvation of God.