Why...just why?

[C3C7NIC]

Originally Posted by bill_daniels

I can understand it, especially for those with chronic, debilitating conditions. You wake up, figure out that this is your life, this is the best it's going to get for you, and you don't like it and want to check out. That seems very reasonable. Say someone is at the beginning or moderate stages of Alzheimers, for example. If that's me, I'm going to get my affairs in order and put a bullet in my head. If I can help it, I'm not going to become a drooling vegetable.

People make decisions about quality of life. For Steven Hawking, being debilitated and in a wheelchair was OK, he chose to live and make the best of it. I personally wouldn't choose to do that. Get affairs in order and check out.

Now, are there people going through emotional or financial problems who aren't making rational decisions? Yes. Those people are using a permanent decision to solve a temporary problem. Those folks need help, although, in the end, the decision should be theirs to make, after they have been given all the facts and options.

You are mentioning 2 examples of suicide victims, the first, I feel is "euthanasia". When the human existence is an irreversible, downward spiral of misery, pain and dependence on others. The second are people are as you stated: a permanent decision to solve a temporary problem. No break up or financial issue is worth taking a life. IMO.

I think there is a 3rd; the people plagued with mental illness, due to no fault of their own, feel an unexplained urge to end their life even in the absence of a circumstance in their life that could somehow trigger the event. Although families know they have mental illness, are still shocked when the unexpected occurs.

In any case, when someone takes their life, those closest to them will probably never come to a complete resolution/closure within their minds. Survivors of suicide, in a way, are victims too.

[VITE1]

Originally Posted by C3C7NIC

You are mentioning 2 examples of suicide victims, the first, I feel is "euthanasia". When the human existence is an irreversible, downward spiral of misery, pain and dependence on others. The second are people are as you stated: a permanent decision to solve a temporary problem. No break up or financial issue is worth taking a life. IMO.

I think there is a 3rd; the people plagued with mental illness, due to no fault of their own, feel an unexplained urge to end their life even in the absence of a circumstance in their life that could somehow trigger the event. Although families know they have mental illness, are still shocked when the unexpected occurs.

In any case, when someone takes their life, those closest to them will probably never come to a complete resolution/closure within their minds. Survivors of suicide, in a way, are victims too.

For the last 2 yeas of my father life whenever asked "What can I do for you" he said "Let me die". He was ignored by the Doctors around him because they could milk his Tri Care plan.

My Brother killed himself in 1987. We still have questions that will never be answered and a bitterness for the void he left.

[C3C7NIC]

Originally Posted by VITE1

For the last 2 yeas of my father life whenever asked "What can I do for you" he said "Let me die". He was ignored by the Doctors around him because they could milk his Tri Care plan.

My Brother killed himself in 1987. We still have questions that will never be answered and a bitterness for the void he left.

Sorry you went through both of those experiences. Hospice, palliative care should always be offered. It is absurd we can control, end the suffering of pets, but humans are expected to linger in misery till their bodies give out.

As with your brother, it is so hard to grieve the lost one. Having been 2 years since my uncle killed himself, not sure you ever get over it. The typical grief process is overshadowed with anger/guilt/confusion.

[Aerovette]

Originally Posted by 69camfrk

Some dude went into the Cheddar's restaurant here in town an hour or so ago, bought everyone at the bar a round, and went in the crapper and promptly blew his brains out. Roughly 1.5 miles from my house. At least he was nice enough to buy everyone a drink, but he should have gone out back and spared someone the cleanup in the restroom. WTFO?

It's Cheddar's. Their bathrooms have seen far worse.


Tragic. I don't understand why anyone would take their own life.

[VITE1]

Originally Posted by C3C7NIC

Sorry you went through both of those experiences. Hospice, palliative care should always be offered. It is absurd we can control, end the suffering of pets, but humans are expected to linger in misery till their bodies give out.

As with your brother, it is so hard to grieve the lost one. Having been 2 years since my uncle killed himself, not sure you ever get over it. The typical grief process is overshadowed with anger/guilt/confusion.

He was in Hospice. He had a living will and DNR and whenever asked by ANYONE he told them "LET ME DIE". He had no fear of dying. Just living like he did. They manipulated my Sister so that when he was close to dying they'd say "He asked for help" then billed 100's of K to Tri Care and Medicare. Bunch of ****ing thieves.

[Olustee bus]

My ex wife did it about 4 years ago. It is still hard for me as I knew what she went through. I lost a beloved cousin when I was in my twenties. For years I just thought, had I known, I could have made a difference.

[69camfrk]

Originally Posted by aerovette

It's Cheddar's. Their bathrooms have seen far worse.


Tragic. I don't understand why anyone would take their own life.

If I was going to croak myself, I can promise that it wouldn't be in the crapper at a restaurant.

[bsmith]

Originally Posted by aerovette

Tragic. I don't understand why anyone would take their own life.

You should be thankful for that....

[TripleBlack]

Originally Posted by C3C7NIC

In any case, when someone takes their life, those closest to them will probably never come to a complete resolution/closure within their minds. Survivors of suicide, in a way, are victims too.

Originally Posted by VITE1

My Brother killed himself in 1987. We still have questions that will never be answered and a bitterness for the void he left.

Originally Posted by C3C7NIC

As with your brother, it is so hard to grieve the lost one. Having been 2 years since my uncle killed himself, not sure you ever get over it. The typical grief process is overshadowed with anger/guilt/confusion.

Originally Posted by Olustee bus

My ex wife did it about 4 years ago. It is still hard for me as I knew what she went through. I lost a beloved cousin when I was in my twenties. For years I just thought, had I known, I could have made a difference.

Originally Posted by bsmith

You should be thankful for that....

bsmith, I hope this is wisdom and not personal experience...
------------------------------------
My $0.02.

Much wisdom and pain in these comments. In my opinion, C3C7NIC nails it: The typical grief process is overshadowed with anger/guilt/confusion.

I'm overwhelmed by all of those now and my prayers go out to those of you who have also lost someone close (or formally close, Olustee bus) to a suicide. I share very little personal stuff here - maybe I'll share my story at some point but not now - not in a thread like this one. I had no clue this was coming and I've learned that's often the case but if you know someone that you think might be troubled, reach out to them.

[bsmith]

Originally Posted by TripleBlack

bsmith, I hope this is wisdom and not personal experience...

I've been pretty open about it over the years at CF, and here.

I know a couple people that have done it, and I've been fighting those thoughts for my entire adult life. I know it doesn't make sense...it's just always there.

This town has more than it's share of suicides and many are covered up to spare the family the stigma.
That is the reason I started speaking out about it...at least online.

One in particular was a coworker that was very active in the Catholic Church and seemed happy as could be.
I got a call one weekend that Mike was dead, he hung himself.
I know someone that was on the scene.
The official story was that it was accidental.
Not a chance.
In hindsight, he had sent me an email a couple days prior and it haunted me.
I felt like I should have seen it coming.

[JRD77VET]

Originally Posted by bsmith

I've been pretty open about it over the years at CF, and here.

I know a couple people that have done it, and I've been fighting those thoughts for my entire adult life. I know it doesn't make sense...it's just always there.

This town has more than it's share of suicides and many are covered up to spare the family the stigma.
That is the reason I started speaking out about it...at least online.

One in particular was a coworker that was very active in the Catholic Church and seemed happy as could be.
I got a call one weekend that Mike was dead, he hung himself.
I know someone that was on the scene.
The official story was that it was accidental.
Not a chance.
In hindsight, he had sent me an email a couple days prior and it haunted me.
I felt like I should have seen it coming.

My former neighbor Vic took himself out. Heart meds altered his formerly rational thought process.

According to his wife, he had mentioned to his heart doctor that he was getting "weird thoughts" but the doctor just brushed it off.

I never saw anything that would have let me know about that. he took himself out on my brother's birthday