Home Schooled......

[Norm]

......back in the day, I was, but not the kids of today.........

1 My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”

2 My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”

3 My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!”

4 My father taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why.”

5 My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me.”

6 My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.”

7 My father taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about.”

8 My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”

9 My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!”

13. My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
"Stop acting like your father!”

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do.”

16.My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home.”

[DAB]

children are hereditary, if your parents didn't have any children, chances are you won't either.

[Antfarmer2]

Sounds like we had the same parents. Where did they hide you?

[bill_daniels]

Originally Posted by DAB

children are hereditary, if your parents didn't have any children, chances are you won't either.

What if I'm adopted?

[m and t's77]

#14 is alive and well in our household.