Anger Management help

[Aerovette]

Originally Posted by Chuck A

I would love to smoke a joint but since being a supervisor on both my jobs and while i really loved to a couple puffs of the weed would help 1000%, why are you not taking puffs, soon it will become legal, i cant wait, need to take the edge off

Just not my thing. I have heard that it would help though.

[Chuck A]

Originally Posted by aerovette

Just not my thing. I have heard that it would help though.

defenitely will help, i wish i can smoke its been at least 25 years for me, freaking drug testing sucks

[Admiral Blue]

There is some great advice in his thread. NAV ... And your exchange with Scott was great. You need an outlet. You also need someone to talk to.

PM sent. I don't know you but you can talk to me.

Good luck.

[The Cripp]

I think (as per usual) Sandy has given the best advice.

Listen to what she said.

Ah... er...

At least, at anytime, you can get up on your feet and walk.

You can walk anywhere you want to, even run!

I can't.

But it's no big thing to me!

I've adapted.

Can't you see this anger problem is trivial in the grand scheme of your life?

Take care please, my friend.

[LATB]

Originally Posted by NEED-A-VETTE

You need to go see a therapist. Immediately. Talk thru your issues and fix yourself. Trying to salvage your marriage is a futile effort without having yourself squared away. You will never make anyone else happy if you aren't happy with yourself.

Tough love time: You're unhappy with your current station in life and you've listed it as a major factor in your anger. Fair enough. So, what are you going to do about it? Sit around and fester over it? Or take the steps to make some changes? Take control of your life. Don't dwell on what you haven't done thus far; focus on what you can do for your future.

Take a few college courses. Do something that gives you a sense of forward momentum. Find a therapist (very soon) that will help you and will (eventually) be able to help your marriage. On a daily basis, go to the gym. Take a jog around the neighborhood. Work off some aggression.

Big changes are simply the sum of small decisions.

Outstanding post right there.

[Rob]

Originally Posted by aerovette

Just not my thing. I have heard that it would help though.

It will help. And stick with edibles instead of smoking. A nibble here and there to maintain the buzz and none of the smell to detect you been blazin.

Aero. I don't know what that I can say that hasn't been said already but I do hope you get some help.

As a couple others have said, the bible carries many answers and it is amazing how clearly they are defined when you take time to read the passages slowly and in a quiet place.

If you need someone to talk with, I have time to talk. I don't have all the answers but I have the time to sit and listen when someone needs to talk.

Tonight after dinner, I suggest going for a walk in the park with your wife. Take a moment to look at the birds and nature around you. Quit letting "things" be your interruptions and devotions - focus on what is most important like friends and family. When you let go to the lines that bind you, you will find how free life should feel.

Rob

[DAB]

i won't pretend to know how to solve this or most other problems, but i can relate what has worked for me over time (as noted previously). all i know is that you have to choose to change that which causes you trouble. no one can do this for you. wish you luck, and you know where to find me here if you want to chat further.

[Aerovette]

There are a few posts suggesting a hobby. I have had a few over the years. By far my best "therapy" is/was singing. When I was in my band I was able to just shake all the "me" off and get on stage and be a different person. A person that had their doo-doo in a pile and was the cool guy with no worries no cares. I have been trying to get back into it but can't find a good fit. I have started recording at home with karaoke tracks just to have something to do but it's not the same and it can be loud in the house. It DOES chill me out though.

I also built model cars in my younger years and I have probably 8 or 10 that are in unopened boxes (all Corvettes). I may clear a work area in my room upstairs and start that up again. Maybe getting those paint fumes back in my nose will have some effect. I know without a doubt idle time is my enemy. Of course I had much better eyesight the last time I built any models.

I like photography...no scratch that. I like "taking pictures". I think I have the eye, but not the technical knowledge. I still like to do it and could probably start again. Maybe that is a class I could take?

I used to tinker with my car or truck but the car is gone and the truck...well it ends up testing my patience so that's counter-productive.

I think exercise and waking up my old hobbies will be my first line of attack. I was really hitting the gym hard many years ago but I was by myself so I never really was "tested" as far as my patience. I only had a 7 minute drive to work at that time too. Now it is an hour each way. That really has me worked up by the time I get home and I instantly become demotivated to do ANYTHING. That's why I am on here all the time. That drive sucks the life out of me.

Thank you for the PMs and I may contact you. If my efforts don't work, I will probably find myself with a lot of time on my hands (translation: single). If that should happen, I'll be sending out invitations to come and hang at my house. I don't do "alone" very well. The side benefit is that if I start to show any temper, I can trust at least one of you to knock me on my ass as part of the healing process.

[Mike Mercury]

Originally Posted by Chuck A

I would love to smoke a joint but since being a supervisor on both my jobs and while i really loved to a couple puffs of the weed would help 1000%, why are you not taking puffs, soon it will become legal, i cant wait, need to take the edge off

I am the exact opposite. I don't want to resort to medicating my personal issues; instead... I want to identify, correct, and then rise above them.

[Giraffe (He/Him)]

Originally Posted by Mike Mercury

I am the exact opposite. I don't want to resort to medicating my personal issues; instead... I want to identify, correct, and then rise above them.

I never understood that either. Getting drunk because something went to shit on me only accomplished one thing; mean drunk.

[Jeff '79]

Originally Posted by Thomas

I never understood that either. Getting drunk because something went to shit on me only accomplished one thing; mean drunk.

You'd be really fun at parties then.
I was usually the babysitter that had to knock friends out from time to time, to keep the peace.

[Giraffe (He/Him)]

Originally Posted by Jeff '79

You'd be really fun at parties then.
I was usually the babysitter that had to knock friends out from time to time, to keep the peace.

That was kinda my point. If I'm in a shit mood that LAST thing I'm gonna do is pour booze on it.

[Jeff '79]

Originally Posted by Thomas

That was kinda my point. If I'm in a shit mood that LAST thing I'm gonna do is pour booze on it.

I had a good friend , well a couple, who were mean or stupid drunks.
I just had to put the hammer down, occasionally, when it got out of hand.
It worked. Peace was restored.
Nuttin' worse than a buzz kill.
Too bad that the drink don't agree with you.
I like tipping a few and just mellowing out.

[Giraffe (He/Him)]

Too bad that the drink don't agree with you.
I like tipping a few and just mellowing out.

It doesn't disagree with me at all. I just don't do it when I'm stressed is all.

[syf350]

Originally Posted by Drew M

What makes you think you're so much better than everyone else?

What makes you think he's not? Let's face it, we don't have to go very far or interact too much to find useless dumb people these days. It is what it is in this day and age.

Op, I can sympathize. And I'd like to think I completely understand. And no, I didn't see anyone. Actually, a stupid ass picture on Facebook kinda opened my eyes. The picture was not important, the message was. Something to the effect of "when I see stupid shit, I just repeat to myself "not my circus, not my monkeys"".

It really does take an attitude change in realizing what's important. That dude that just cut you off? Well, he must have somewhere really important to be. Do I give a shit? Nope. That dumb shit your wife just did? Is it going to bankrupt you or cause a divorce? Then who cares.

Life's too short.

[LATB]

Originally Posted by Thomas

That was kinda my point. If I'm in a shit mood that LAST thing I'm gonna do is pour booze on it.

yeah...but a bud buzz can do wonders.

[LATB]

Originally Posted by syf350

What makes you think he's not? Let's face it, we don't have to go very far or interact too much to find useless dumb people these days. It is what it is in this day and age.

I have a standing joke with my wife...

"how long after I leave the house in the morning before I encounter my 1st asshole".

some days I barely make it out of the driveway...other days I'll text her at noon with a

[Giraffe (He/Him)]

Originally Posted by LATB

yeah...but a bud buzz can do wonders.

Not interested. It typically led to one thing with me; some sort of altercation, over some perceived slight or insult. Those days are behind me. Thanks goodness.

[LATB]

Originally Posted by Thomas

Not interested. It typically led to one thing with me; some sort of altercation, over some perceived slight or insult.

yeah, I could see that.

[syf350]

Now, after having read the whole thread, I would like to offer a couple unsolicited comments.

First, a talk with your wife is in order. If not for help, then to at least see what she's made of, and can understand where you are and where you want to be. I don't know you or her, but dealing with someone that can't see past their own needs will not help you, and quote honestly may be part of the problem. Your talk will let you know if she's in or out.

Next, yeah the hobby thing may or may not work. To me, that's a distraction and not a fix.

Professional help? Not much help there. There are people that it can work for and people it doesn't. Personally I don't think it helps me. Does that mean I think I am above it? Absolutely not. Just not how I am wired. And yes I have been to professional help before.

Pot? Who am I to discourage that, but again. Distraction, not correction.

It is all attitude. Someone said it, you can't control shit, but you can control how you react to shit. YOU can decide to laugh.