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Off Topic Off Topic - General non-Corvette related discussion. |
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01-15-2017, 4:35pm | #1 | ||||||
Latin American Goat Roper
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Snotty receptionist......
Snotty Receptionist
Yesterday I had an appointment to see the urologist for a prostate exam. Of course I was a bit on edge because all my friends have either gone under the knife or had those pellets implanted. The waiting room was filled with patients. As I approached the receptionist’s desk, I noticed that she was a large unfriendly woman who looked like a Sumo wrestler. I gave her my name, and in a very loud voice, she said, “YES, I HAVE YOU NAME HERE. YOU WANT TO SEE THE DOCTOR ABOUT IMPOTENCE, RIGHT? All the patients in the waiting room snapped their heads around to look at me, a now very embarrassed man. But as usual, I recovered quickly, and in an equally loud voice replied, “NO, I’VE COME TO INQUIRE ABOUT A SEX CHANGE OPERATION, BUT I DON’T WANT THE SAME DOCTOR THAT DID YOURS.” The room erupted in applause! DON’T MESS WITH OLD RETIRED GUYS |
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01-15-2017, 4:47pm | #2 | ||||||
Barn Stall Owner #74
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Good one👍
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01-15-2017, 5:06pm | #3 | ||||||
Bantayan Kids '13,'14,'15,'17
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A young man named Donald bought a horse from a farmer for $250. The farmer agreed to deliver the horse the next day.
The next day, the farmer drove up to Donald's house and said, “Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the horse died.” Donald replied, “Well, then just give me my money back.” The farmer said, “Can’t do that. I went and spent it already.” Donald said, “Ok, then, just bring me the dead horse.” The farmer asked, “What ya gonna do with him?” Donald said, “I’m going to raffle him off.” The farmer said, “You can’t raffle off a dead horse!” Donald said, “Sure I can, Watch me. I just won’t tell anybody he’s dead.” A month Later, the farmer met up with Donald and asked, “What happened with that dead horse?” Donald said, “I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at five dollars a piece and made a profit of $2495.” The farmer said, “Didn’t anyone complain?” Donald said, “Just the guy who won. So I gave him his five dollars back.” Donald is moving into the White House next Friday ! |
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01-15-2017, 5:17pm | #4 | ||||||
Sparkles Flambeaux
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I was going to beat that dead horse for exercise, but my wife said no.
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01-15-2017, 5:19pm | #5 | ||||||
Sparkles Flambeaux
Barn Stall Owner #4 Barn Raising I,II NCM Supporter '13,'14,'15,'16,'17,'21 Bantayan Kids '13,'14,'15,'17
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500 x $5 = $2500
Minus refunded ticket of $5 Minus $250 for the dead horse Profit = $2245 |
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01-16-2017, 12:46am | #6 | ||||||
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01-16-2017, 8:18am | #7 | ||||||
Chief Meat Gazer
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01-16-2017, 10:27am | #8 | ||||||
10cm member
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The initial $250 was reported as a business loss that he could carry forward to offset income taxes in the future, so that's not entirely correct. The horse was fully depreciated.
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01-16-2017, 2:08pm | #9 | ||||||
Moderator
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