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Old 04-27-2021, 8:29am   #81
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hadnít updated the beneficiary. .
I redid all that and my will during my divorce. My attorney told me you'd be surprised how many ex wives suddenly appear out of nowhere hoping the ex didn't update his will or beneficiaries. I'm talking marriages that have been over and done for 20 years.
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Old 04-27-2021, 9:38am   #82
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I redid all that and my will during my divorce. My attorney told me you'd be surprised how many ex wives suddenly appear out of nowhere hoping the ex didn't update his will or beneficiaries. I'm talking marriages that have been over and done for 20 years.
I just dropped life insurance entirely. Not safe being worth more dead than alive.
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Old 04-27-2021, 10:00am   #83
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Not safe being worth more dead than alive.



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Old 04-27-2021, 11:01am   #84
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The big mistake was getting married.

That's all we ever are.

There's no point in trying to be fair, in a divorce situation. The more you give, the more they'll take. Whether her lawyer tells her she can get more, or her friends tell her that she's entitled to everything. Doesn't matter if you cheated or not, or if she cheated or not. As far as she's concerned, YOU OWE HER!

However, you don't owe her shit. Take care of the youngest kid, obviously. Since she clearly wants to ruin you financially, do the same to her. Sell the house, pay off the debts. Walk away from this with as little debt as possible.

Don't worry about her being in financial ruin when the dust settles. She has a vagina that she'll use to get financial security from someone else.

Good luck to you!

Fuggin spot on

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Oh, and why is divorce so damn expensive? Because, it's ****ing worth it!
Not sure on this. That 200K plus looked better in my account
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Old 04-27-2021, 11:04am   #85
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Whether her lawyer tells her she can get more, or her friends tell her that she's entitled to everything.... As far as she's concerned, YOU OWE HER!

point.
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Old 04-27-2021, 8:55pm   #86
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I hope it doesn't drag out much longer for you and you can get on with your life.
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Old 04-27-2021, 11:26pm   #87
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My overwhelming advice is to handle this as business, rather than emotionally driven. I know that's difficult, as I have been in your place.

Have the attorneys draw up a 50/50 deal, with consideration of your kid's education. This includes all assets and liabilities, including both retirements on the asset side. If her attorney, or her, refuses to do so, then go to court and show that she and her attorney are not negotiating with good faith.

Don't know where you live, but the divorce settlements theses days when both spouses are capable of supporting themselves are much more equitable.

The back story of you getting out to support her, as well as other verbal commitments, are meaningless at this point. Just go with the current data and situation. Current judges are pretty sensitive to someone trying to f the other person over. I think some lawyers work on the folklore of the "wife cleaning you out" to get a better agreed settlement from the husband because the husband feels he starts behind the eight ball.

Be fair. Be aggressive when necessary. Find a lawyer that will represent you without sucking your tit for a year or more.
The bold part.

I did what I could to keep her from leaving but once she did, the divorce terms simply became a math problem.
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Old 05-03-2021, 10:33am   #88
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You guys want to read some painful chit. Check it out. Just read some of the crap guys are put through. http://www.realworlddivorce.com/

Fuggin teaching women it is ok to fleece a man for life kinda chit. Look at your state. Tell every fricken young guy you know. Do not marry and have a vesectomy right NOW!
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Old 05-04-2021, 8:02am   #89
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Think you got it rough? Bill and Melinda Gates are divorcing. I guess she didn't want the VAX after all.

Or she just wants to party with Bezos' ex. Still feel for you OP. Hang in there.
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Old 05-04-2021, 9:49am   #90
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Old 05-04-2021, 9:53am   #91
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Think you got it rough? Bill and Melinda Gates are divorcing.
You think divorce is "rough" for billionaires like Gates and Bezos? Even if they give away half their shit they are still in the top 1% richest people in the world. They have multiple homes so they don't have to continue living with their ex-spouse. They have no problem paying the lawyer's fees. Their lawyers handle all the negotiations and their lives are as minimally impacted as humanly possible - no worse than breaking up with a girlfriend.
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Old 05-04-2021, 12:01pm   #92
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Had a friend whoís wife was cheating on him while he was deployed. She eventually told him and left with her new squeeze. He left the service but still had SGLI while he was on terminal leave and hadnít updated the beneficiary. Tragically, he was killed in a car accident not long after and his ex received his life insurance bennies.

That shit would cause me to haunt the bitch if possible.
Whores who cheat on deployed spouses should be hung from lamp-posts.

Sad.
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Old 05-04-2021, 12:06pm   #93
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Whores who cheat on deployed spouses should be hung from lamp-posts.

Sad.
I was sent to the USS Iwo Jima mid deployment because the AD1 I was replacing walked into the tail rotor of a Cobra after receiving word that his wife was divorcing him.
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Old 05-04-2021, 4:20pm   #94
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Whores who cheat on deployed spouses should be hung from lamp-posts.

Sad.
When I was in the Navy I was on a ballistic missile sub, two crews, one boat. The whole crew got called out to a muster one day and the CO told a story. It turns out a single guy from one of the crews was boning a wife whose guy was on the other crew. It ended in divorce, but the punchline was the single guy was court marshaled, reduced in rank, and ordered to pay the other guy's alimony and child support. The CO suggested that everyone learn from that story.
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Old 05-04-2021, 4:39pm   #95
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I was sent to the USS Iwo Jima mid deployment because the AD1 I was replacing walked into the tail rotor of a Cobra after receiving word that his wife was divorcing him.
Holy. Sh*t.
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Old 05-05-2021, 7:22am   #96
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You think divorce is "rough" for billionaires like Gates and Bezos? Even if they give away half their shit they are still in the top 1% richest people in the world. They have multiple homes so they don't have to continue living with their ex-spouse. They have no problem paying the lawyer's fees. Their lawyers handle all the negotiations and their lives are as minimally impacted as humanly possible - no worse than breaking up with a girlfriend.
Fair point.
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Old 05-05-2021, 8:23am   #97
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When I was in the Navy I was on a ballistic missile sub, two crews, one boat. The whole crew got called out to a muster one day and the CO told a story. It turns out a single guy from one of the crews was boning a wife whose guy was on the other crew. It ended in divorce, but the punchline was the single guy was court marshaled, reduced in rank, and ordered to pay the other guy's alimony and child support. The CO suggested that everyone learn from that story.
Sounds like good leadership. I witnessed the opposite. A non-deployed E3 had moved into post housing with one of our soldierís wives who happened to be married to an E5 and the chain of command didnít do shit. The E5 moved into the barracks and the E3 continued to live in his housing. WTF?

The unit was being drawn down and the kaserne closed so maybe that had something to do with the lack of action or maybe something happened that Iím not aware of? Donít know but had I been in charge, that shithead would have been forcibly removed from housing immediately.

It went on for at least a month that Iím aware of but I had to go to a military course and when I returned, the unit was down to a handful of folks.

That said, feels like we are beating up on women? Lots of shitty guyís out there too.
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Old 05-05-2021, 11:38am   #98
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Sounds like good leadership. I witnessed the opposite. A non-deployed E3 had moved into post housing with one of our soldierís wives who happened to be married to an E5 and the chain of command didnít do shit. The E5 moved into the barracks and the E3 continued to live in his housing. WTF?

The unit was being drawn down and the kaserne closed so maybe that had something to do with the lack of action or maybe something happened that Iím not aware of? Donít know but had I been in charge, that shithead would have been forcibly removed from housing immediately.

It went on for at least a month that Iím aware of but I had to go to a military course and when I returned, the unit was down to a handful of folks.

That said, feels like we are beating up on women? Lots of shitty guyís out there too.
Takes two to tango right. He did not move in there on his own. There are more women that screw men over. The statistics bear this out. Over 80% of women file for divorce. It is only going to get worse. Check out some of the scenarios in my post in some of these states that fuggin make men slaves for life to child support and alice isn't horny anymore money aka=(alimony)
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Old 05-05-2021, 12:43pm   #99
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Takes two to tango right. He did not move in there on his own. There are more women that screw men over. The statistics bear this out. Over 80% of women file for divorce. It is only going to get worse. Check out some of the scenarios in my post in some of these states that fuggin make men slaves for life to child support and alice isn't horny money anymore(alimony)
No doubt, government incentives encourage and ensure it. I knew a couple of divorced guys that lived in an attic together. They said when the wind was 25mph outside, it was 15mph in their "apartment". Child support is a mofo.
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Old 05-05-2021, 1:06pm   #100
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No doubt, government incentives encourage and ensure it. I knew a couple of divorced guys that lived in an attic together. They said when the wind was 25mph outside, it was 15mph in their "apartment". Child support is a mofo.
Yes sir it is. Two left. You know the money is not even the worst part. The alienation from your kids is the worst part. In 90% of the cases the mother that filed gets the kids. She can make it damn near impossible to have the same relationship you had with them before divorce, and then introduce the new dick to the mix, and it just sucks. Men are just a paycheck. You get screwed over because she changed her mind etc... It is just a pile of chit for men in divorce. You can make back the money, but you can never get back the time lost or the relationship cost from losing your kids to this crap
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