All the best to you OP; you've certainly had more than your "fair share" of medical adventures.
Your catheter description puzzles me though. I had one for a few days following kidney stone surgery & it was pretty much a non-event. A nurse even had to change it once during the night due to a blockage, and I had no discomfort at all.
(Did you ever see the scene in "Nurse Jackie" when she removes the catheter from a pedophile who was in the hospital?
)