Quote:
Originally Posted by MrPeabody
When Chuck Norris does push-ups he is actually remaining still and pushing the earth away from him.
And we're off...
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This is almost three pages of Chuck Norris single liners
http://www.icndb.com/the-jokes-2/
The start of it
Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.
MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips. Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always answers "Two seconds till". After you ask "Two seconds to what?", he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.
Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest.
Chuck Norris won by 5.
Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.