Blind Date!
After being with his blind date for what seemed like eternity, the man took a call on his cell phone.
Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him so he would have an excuse to leave if something like this happened.
When he hung up the phone, he put on a grim expression and said,"I have some bad news, my grandfather just died." Thank heavens," his blind date replied."If yours hadn't, mine would have too."
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I walked into a library and asked for a book on suicide.
"**** off," said the librarian, "You won't bring it back."
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