Sorry to hear about all the trials you've been put thru. I'll pray / wish the best for you as you move forward.
Hasn't been a good year for me either, BIL died in Jan, lost our Swissy Levi suddenly in April ( acute leukemia ) , 88 year old MIL fell and broke her leg, another BIL passed last month , just to name a few.
Here's to a better 2020 Thomas
Jeff