Aero, I understand each of those feelings you expressed. Been there done that. I was 45 at the time.
I just turned 60. It DOES get better, I promise you. If someone had told me back then that I would be in the position I'm in today, I simply would not have believed them.
Have faith. And I'm not talking religious faith, just faith that a day will come that you will look back and understand that what happened was truly for the best.
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