[Norm]

I THOUGHT GETTING OLDER WOULD TAKE LONGER.

A WISE MAN ONCE SAID - - NOTHING.

RESPECT YOUR ELDERS; THEY GRADUATED SCHOOL WITHOUT THE INTERNET.

I'VE DECIDED I'M NOT OLD; I'M 25 PLUS SHIPPING AND HANDLING.

WHY DO I HAVE TO PRESS "1" FOR ENGLISH? DID AMERICA MOVE?

WE HAVE ENOUGH GUN CONTROL; WHAT WE NEED IS IDIOT CONTROL.

BEHIND EVERY ANGRY WOMAN STANDS MAN WHO HAS ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHAT HE DID WRONG.

LET'S STOP SENDING MONEY TO OTHER COUNTRIES AND LET THEM HATE US FOR FREE.

VEGETARIAN: ANCIENT TRIBAL NAME FOR THE VILLAGE IDIOT WHO CAN'T HUNT, FISH OR LIGHT FIRES!

I LOOK AT PEOPLE AND SOMETIMES THINK..."REALLY? THAT'S THE SPERM THAT WON?"

IN MY DEFENSE I WAS LEFT UNSUPERVISED.

IF GUNS KILL PEOPLE, THEN PENCILS MISSPELL WORDS, CARS MAKE PEOPLE DRIVE DRUNK, AND SPOONS MAKE PEOPLE FAT.

MY DECISION-MAKING SKILLS CLOSELY RESEMBLE THOSE OF SQUIRREL WHEN CROSSING THE ROAD.

SOME THINGS ARE JUST BETTER LEFT UNSAID. AND I USUALLY REALIZE IT RIGHT AFTER I SAY THEM.

WE OWE ILLEGALS NOTHING; WE OWE OUR VETERANS EVERYTHING.

CAMPING: WHERE YOU SPEND SMALL FORTUNE TO LIVE LIKE HOMELESS PERSON.