Well **** me. The earliest they can get me in is the 16th. I have to go another eight days like this. I’m not sure I’ll make it without an ugly trip to the ER. I will try.
Somehow I have to find the strength to work. I can’t take off two more weeks. I was hoping to go visit my mom, but that’s out. Sigh.:kick: |
More prayers for you :angel:
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:angel: |
Call the dr office 2-3 times a day and politely ask if there have been any cancellations.
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Maybe just call once a day though. After the first day, they'll know who you are and why you're calling. :waiting: |
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This has truly been a living hell. One surgery turned into four to fix mistake after mistake. First surgery - emergency resection Second - the incision caused a hernia During the hernia repair, a nurse bludgeoned me with a cath - had cath for 2 weeks Third - Then a urologist did a ballon expansion that only lasted three months - had cath for 2 weeks Fourth surgery - Next a complete reconstruction - cath for 30 days This is number five. Cath for 4 days During this time I’ve had three procedures akin to a colonoscopy to expand my small intestine. Two enteroscopies, 2 CAT scans, three MRI’S, plus two ER trips, 18 chemo treatments, 52 IV fluid sessions, 12 iron infusions 125ish injections and too many labs to count. I’ve never shared this with anyone. I just hide it. And to think, I never had surgery before all this. WTF. This is seriously getting tiring. To add insult to injury, my wife can’t accompany me because COVID. funny, I never thought it was needed to have her there. Now I could use the support. I’m sorry to bitch. I know many have it worse. I’m getting to my wits end. There must be an end to this somehow but none in sight right now. |
Pete, take your wife with you anyway. Insist she go in with you. Really insist. :angel:
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Does this mask make my face look fat?
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:sadangel:
Hoping for a speedy recovery!! |
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It might be cliched’ but it does help. Honestly the thought of giving up crosses my mind regularly. But I am not really wired for giving up. There must be a limit to how much one can endure. I think if I were single, the equation might be different. But people I love rely on me. I will walk through fire for them.
I have this creeping feeling that if there is widespread civil unrest, people like me won’t survive it. The treatments I need are drugs that require special handling, refrigeration, mixing by a pharmacist, IV pumps. It also must be used within hours of mixing. It comes as a powder that needs refrigeration. It is only made in one facility by one manufacturer. Lately Ive seen shortages of regular drugs. It’s just a matter of time. I suppose that’s why I’m up for the fight. If I go down, I’m taking some commie mother****ers with me. I’m doing everything I can to get fit for battle conditions. Whether it happens or not. From upping hormone replacement, working out, heat conditioning, 7K ruck marches with 45 lbs of gear, specialized tactical training, Tactical Combat Casualty Care (TCCC), I’m FEMA certified as first responder (this makes it so the local police have no authority over me in a disaster scenario) Radio operator (getting license this month)...etc. I have to get whatever is ****ed up fixed in this case I don’t have a choice. We are in for a rough ride and I believe our way of life is at extreme risk. Even though I’m old and broken down, I am mustering everything I’ve got to serve this great nation. It’s the reason I do anything these days - an overwhelming sense of duty and purpose. That’s my version of not giving up. Far too many are willing to sit on the sidelines. I can’t share too much here, but let’s just say my work in this area isn’t casual. |
You can do it, Pete.
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