Wifey on plane to Assville, to pick up Elvis, BUT,,,
 

,,, she told me to clean up the house before she gets back tomorrow.

WTF does that mean, I am unsure, do I hire a cleaning service, or leave my clothes on the island stools.

Biggest mess is Ringo's and Dolly's toys strewn all over, adds character to our abode.

Need some sage wisdom here,,,

less typing more cleaning

Put your apron on and stfu

It’s a trap! If you clean the joint up, that tells her that she is really not needed around there. Leave a mess and let her know how much you need and appreciate her. Report back tomorrow on how well this worked!

Pressure wash the whole interior. It'll be like-new.

EFFING NUGGET!!:cert:

Since I believe she is bringing home a puppy I would take this as spread newspaper in all effected areas. :leaving:

I am thinking the place is clean enough, much cleaner than most.

So tonight, pizza and chicken wings for me and Ringo and Dolly, and then invite the neighbor over for a few drams and pilsners!!

When she comes home I will just blame the doggies!!

Yet ANOTHER nugget, thanks Biggie--good to have you back, you were missed!!

Call The Gal. :yesnod:

:willy: If you clean the house, she'll know you can actually do it and expect you to do just that more and more often. I say throw a raging kegger, trash the place, and keep all suspicion of your possible competence out of her mind.

EFFING ANOTHER NUGGET, she is setting me up BIG TIME!!
If she comes back to clean house, I got me three new issues:

1) She gets spoiled
2) She knows I been sandbagging
3) I am screwed for the rest of our marriage

She does NOT want you to clean the house. She wants you to WANT to clean the house.

That is totally different. Tell her you really wanted it to be pristine and you looked forward to making her happy, but you got up ready to get started and you had a massive headache and had to lay down. You REALLY wanted to have it all taken care of, but it was just out of the question.

Advice...get a toy box.

Been married 33+ years, I do not really WANT to do anything I have not done prior to now.
I ask for very little in return, other than to tend to my Ringo and my Dolly!!

Already have one,,,

BEST SUPERIOR TOP-TIER NUGGET YET!!
Best advice yet, not sure why I did not go straight to you with a PM.
How long have you enjoyed marital bliss RB,,, 40 years, 50 years??

You should be able to find young women on craigslist willing to clean your house :yesnod:

Drink all the beer and alcohol in the house. Be sure to throw all the empties in the outside trash can. Then tell her what a great job you did emptying the fridge and taking out the garbage....:D

Did you hack into my security cameras or something? :toetap: