Personal ad decoder
 

MEN’S ADS:
40-ish: 52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic: Watches a lot of NASCAR
Good looking: Arrogant
Very good looking: Dumb as a board
Honest: Pathological liar
Likes to cuddle: Insecure mama’s boy
Mature: Older than your father
Physically fit: Does a lot of 12-ounce curls
Thoughtful: Says “Excuse me” when he farts
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/4b/61...af59c64ca5.jpg


WOMEN’S ADS:
40-ish: 49
Adventurer: Has dated all your friends
Athletic: No chest
Average looking: Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful: Pathological liar
Emotionally Secure: Medicated
Fun: Annoying
Gentle: Comatose
Outgoing: Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate: Sloppy drunk
https://i.chzbgr.com/full/2703184896/h357BE99B/

Is this available in wallet card format?

A woman took an inexperienced man home one night...

When they got to her apartment, she suggested that they try a 69.

“What do you mean?” he asked.

Not knowing quite how to explain, she said, “You put your head between my legs and I’ll put my head between your legs.”

Still unsure but willing, he agreed. As soon as he got his head between her legs, she let out a rip-roaring fart.

“What the hell was that?!?” he asked.

“Oops! I’m so sorry! Let’s try again,” she said.

On the second attempt the very same thing happened. The man immediately got up and started getting dressed.

“Where are you going?” she asked.

To which he replied, “If you think I’m sticking around for 67 more of those, you’re crazy!!”