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Old 03-20-2017, 05:23am   #1 (permalink)
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Default Duffy and the blonde.....

Duffy, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM.
He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV.
The 10:00 PM news was coming on.
The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump.

The blonde looked at Duffy and said, 'Do you think he'll jump?'
Duffy says, 'You know, I bet he'll jump.'
The blonde replied, 'Well, I bet he won't.'

Duffy placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, 'You're on!'
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.
The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her $20 to Duffy, saying, 'Fair's fair. Here's your money.'
Duffy replied, 'I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 PM news and so I knew he would jump.'
The blond replied, 'I did too; but I didn't think he'd do it again.'

Duffy took the money...
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Old 03-20-2017, 05:26am   #2 (permalink)
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Old 03-20-2017, 07:58am   #3 (permalink)
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very funny, indeed
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Old 03-20-2017, 08:31am   #4 (permalink)
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Old 03-20-2017, 10:32am   #5 (permalink)
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That is a good one!
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Old 03-20-2017, 10:48am   #6 (permalink)
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gotta have my blonde wife read this one.....
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Old 03-20-2017, 10:49am   #7 (permalink)
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Q: How do you keep a blonde busy for hours?
A: Write "Please turn over" on both sides of a piece of paper.
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Old 03-20-2017, 10:50am   #8 (permalink)
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blonde digs a square hole for planting a tree (the root ball was square), but ends up with a round pile of dirt. freaks her out.
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Old 03-20-2017, 10:55am   #9 (permalink)
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A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram." She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word "comfortable." Skeptical, the operator asks, "How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?" The redhead replies, "She's a blonde so she reads slow: 'Come for ta bull.'"
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Old 03-20-2017, 11:11am   #10 (permalink)
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Old 03-20-2017, 11:42am   #11 (permalink)
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Two blonds came across a set of tracks in the woods. One said "Those are deer tracks!", the other said "No, those are moose tracks!". And they stood there and argued about it until the train hit them.
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