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Old 03-19-2017, 11:52am   #1 (permalink)
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31 year old feral man child. Single, not housebroken. Kind to animals and is bundled with two. Politics range from libertarian to alt-left depending on the medication being taken. Believes in consumerism. Giverism not recognized. Prone to basement dwelling and manipulating emotions. Ungrateful prick.

Other than that, he'll make someone a great roommate/spouse/partner.

$500 bonus to caller who rehomes him elsewhere.

The number to call is 800-549-GTFO.



I'm too old for this shit.
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Old 03-19-2017, 12:00pm   #2 (permalink)
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Old 03-19-2017, 12:20pm   #3 (permalink)
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Thanks for taking this in the vein it is offered. I'm in a frustrating situation and humor has never failed to deliver.

Really love where you're living, BTW. Great place to be.
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Old 03-19-2017, 09:37pm   #4 (permalink)
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Buy him a Russian mail order bride? Contract with OWN for a reality show based on their odyssey after you throw his worthless ass out? Both might be just what he needs.
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Old 03-19-2017, 09:46pm   #5 (permalink)
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Baseball bats. They're not just for baseball.
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Old 03-20-2017, 06:39am   #6 (permalink)
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Move out of your house, change your name, drop said moocher off at a gas station 10,000 miles from where you are going to be and HAUL ASS!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 03-20-2017, 07:06am   #7 (permalink)
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If one of my kids moved back in, they KNOW they would be back to curfews, daily chores, and me on their ass every day about getting the f*ck out.
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Old 03-20-2017, 08:09am   #8 (permalink)
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Old 03-20-2017, 11:22am   #9 (permalink)
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Give him a deadline to be out.
Make sure he get's that deadline in writing.
Give him a list of storage unit facilities in the area.
Let him know that his two pets will not be staying either, and give him a list of shelters or boarders in the area also.
Let him know that movers and the pound are on standby on the day after the deadline.
Let him know that the locks will be changed on the day after the deadline.

I have no problem with saying get the f'ck out and following up on it.
We have to deal with a ton of shit in our lives, and life is way too short to have to deal with someones shit that we don't have to.
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Old 03-20-2017, 12:17pm   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Broken Wind View Post
Thanks for taking this in the vein it is offered. I'm in a frustrating situation and humor has never failed to deliver.

Really love where you're living, BTW. Great place to be.
You are aware that most homes in Florida do not have basements? Move here and he has no where to live.
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Old 03-20-2017, 12:18pm   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OddBall View Post
Give him a deadline to be out.
Make sure he get's that deadline in writing.
Give him a list of storage unit facilities in the area.
Let him know that his two pets will not be staying either, and give him a list of shelters or boarders in the area also.
Let him know that movers and the pound are on standby on the day after the deadline.
Let him know that the locks will be changed on the day after the deadline.

I have no problem with saying get the f'ck out and following up on it.
We have to deal with a ton of shit in our lives, and life is way too short to have to deal with someones shit that we don't have to.
Send him on vacation. Move all his stuff out, change the locks and prepay for 3 months on a cheep apartment.
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Old 03-20-2017, 02:23pm   #12 (permalink)
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Quote:
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Send him on vacation. Move all his stuff out, change the locks and prepay for 3 months on a cheep apartment.
Love it! Not sure if it's legal in all states, but love it!
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Old 03-20-2017, 02:39pm   #13 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OddBall View Post
Give him a deadline to be out.
Make sure he get's that deadline in writing.
Give him a list of storage unit facilities in the area.
Let him know that his two pets will not be staying either, and give him a list of shelters or boarders in the area also.
Let him know that movers and the pound are on standby on the day after the deadline.
Let him know that the locks will be changed on the day after the deadline.

I have no problem with saying get the f'ck out and following up on it.
We have to deal with a ton of shit in our lives, and life is way too short to have to deal with someones shit that we don't have to.
Wish it was this easy.

Here's my first recommendation - Talk to a Family Law Attorney to see where you stand legally.
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