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View Full Version : Cutting board give away - to a good home


DAB
05-12-2016, 5:53pm
I made a custom cutting board for someone i met at BR2, i sent pictures before sending the board, no objections were raised then. they got the board, said they liked it, again, no objections raised. patiently waited for the agreed payment to be sent, finally after a month of waiting, they finally decided to tell me that they didn't like it, declaring it wasn't 'fancy' enough. fine, either pay me, or send it back.

well, i finally got it back today, it's in good shape, having never been used, and barely unpacked.

so far, i have about $75 into this, about $25 in shipping, and about $50 in materials and consumables. long gone is my fee for making this. fine, lesson learned.

so here's the once in a lifetime offer to all y'all:

tell me, in a brief manner please, why you would give it a good home. i'll take submissions on this thread until next week Tuesday, May 17, 2016 at midnight MDT. i'll drink copious amounts of coffee and water the next morning, judge the entries according to a super-secret methodology (including grading for humor, grammar, spelling, verb tense, etc), and select a winner.

you can appeal to my emotions, to my logic, you can tell me it's for a family/friend and why they would really like it. basically the only rule is to be succinct. brevity is the soul of wit.

yes, the above rules basically mean Gene will need help if he wants to enter. :rofl: my Gene-translator is decent, but not perfect.

as for Spence....please, no Latin. or verbose ramblings. and no references to trains. :slap:

winner has to promise (cross your heart and pinky swear) to send me $30 to cover my shipping to you. i will haul my sorry ass to UPS again and send it to you via UPS Ground (if you want it faster, i'll get a quote and you can pony up the extra $$). payment can be either via snail mail and check, or via paypal (i'll PM you my account email addy).

they wanted a board with the initial "S", so that's what i made.

dimensions are 12-1/2" wide, 14-1/4" tall, 1-7/8" thick. maple and cherry.

pics below:

good luck.

99 pewtercoupe
05-12-2016, 5:58pm
S as in Spence? He needs this
Hopefully he can craft a sufficiently concise reason why he should get it
Put the gin down Larry. :shots:

Datawiz
05-12-2016, 6:15pm
Quid Pro Quo? :D

DAB
05-12-2016, 6:18pm
Quid Pro Quo? :D

:skep:

ok, that's pretty short, but i'm not sure what you are getting at.

no, this was not made for Spence. they rarely post here.

Datawiz
05-12-2016, 6:20pm
:skep:

ok, that's pretty short, but i'm not sure what you are getting at.

no, this was not made for Spence. they rarely post here.

Vette Barn Banner for cutting board. I will pay the shipping. Might even pay a little extra. ;)

Quid Pro Quo

DAB
05-12-2016, 6:28pm
Vette Barn Banner for cutting board. I will pay the shipping. Might even pay a little extra. ;)

Quid Pro Quo (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quid_pro_quo)

ok, that's one entry.

:DAB:

well, your last name does end in an S.... :dance:

markids77
05-12-2016, 6:49pm
I have this affinity for orphaned objects. Especially handcrafted orphans. And I already have your mailing address!

DAB
05-12-2016, 6:51pm
:ohnoes:

is that your entry?

99 pewtercoupe
05-12-2016, 6:54pm
:skep:

ok, that's pretty short, but i'm not sure what you are getting at.

no, this was not made for Spence. they rarely post here.

I didn't mean to suggest it was originally made for our esteemed legal beagle.
However if by fate it has his surname initial...

markids77
05-12-2016, 7:10pm
:ohnoes:

is that your entry?

It was either that or something like this:
That thing is beautiful; obviously created by a true craftsman, and made with love. The joinery is without fault, even on the edges of the letter. I definitely lack the skill and patience to create such a masterpiece and I would be positively thrilled to own, display and use such a marvelous object even though there is no "S" at all in my name. I am in awe of the talent and creativity used to make that board!

Any customer who might find fault with the quality or construction of this artwork should have their heads examined, and if they be members here face censure for having the poor taste to complain. However, since karma can be quite the bitch, I am certain that what has gone around will come around again.

In closing, allow me to entreat you to choose ME over anyone else who will ask that they be lucky enough to have fortune smile on them in this manner!

However, since brevity was requested, and I so seldom "win" anything I decided to be brief and odd enough to be noticed.:seasix:

DAB
05-12-2016, 7:17pm
It was either that or something like this:
That thing is beautiful; obviously created by a true craftsman, and made with love. The joinery is without fault, even on the edges of the letter. I definitely lack the skill and patience to create such a masterpiece and I would be positively thrilled to own, display and use such a marvelous object even though there is no "S" at all in my name. I am in awe of the talent and creativity used to make that board!

Any customer who might find fault with the quality or construction of this artwork should have their heads examined, and if they be members here face censure for having the poor taste to complain. However, since karma can be quite the bitch, I am certain that what has gone around will come around again.

In closing, allow me to entreat you to choose ME over anyone else who will ask that they be lucky enough to have fortune smile on them in this manner!

However, since brevity was requested, and I so seldom "win" anything I decided to be brief and odd enough to be noticed.:seasix:

that's a fine entry, so noted.

now...if you had started off with the history of wood.....and included the phrase "call me Ishmael...", you would have lost marks.... :dance::rofl:

JRD77VET
05-12-2016, 7:59pm
Not an entry ( as we already traded :cert: ) but very nice to offer one of your handcrafted custom wooden works of art :clap:


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v78/JRD77VET/Triples/home%20shop/help/buckle/DSC01330.jpg~original

snide
05-12-2016, 8:02pm
ok, that's one entry.

:DAB:

well, your last name does end in an S.... :dance:

The only one in our household with a name that starts with S is our cat Salem. Yet, he's black. Er, African American. Wait, he's never been to Africa. He's black.

Or it could be a 5. We have 5 pets. No wait, we have 6. Shit. Hey, shit begins with S, and sometimes I'm full of shit. :yesnod:

And we need a cutting board. How can you carve roast beef, or turkeyon a dinner plate?

:cheers:

Nox
05-12-2016, 8:08pm
You can send it over here so Sandy will quit phucking up my custom chef's knives by cutting food on paper plates. :leaving:

http://i233.photobucket.com/albums/ee297/bobmwr/KNIVES/94F57652-69E9-4817-A587-5FD13DBF013D_zpsgdqaunxk.jpg

DAB
05-12-2016, 8:13pm
You can send it over here so Sandy will quit phucking up my custom chef's knives by cutting food on paper plates. :leaving:

http://i233.photobucket.com/albums/ee297/bobmwr/KNIVES/94F57652-69E9-4817-A587-5FD13DBF013D_zpsgdqaunxk.jpg

Short, sweet, and pictures too! Entered.

DAB
05-12-2016, 8:13pm
The only one in our household with a name that starts with S is our cat Salem. Yet, he's black. Er, African American. Wait, he's never been to Africa. He's black.

Or it could be a 5. We have 5 pets. No wait, we have 6. Shit. Hey, shit begins with S, and sometimes I'm full of shit. :yesnod:

And we need a cutting board. How can you carve roast beef, or turkeyon a dinner plate?

:cheers:

Rambling, but I got it. Entered.

DAB
05-12-2016, 8:14pm
Not an entry ( as we already traded :cert: ) but very nice to offer one of your handcrafted custom wooden works of art :clap:


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v78/JRD77VET/Triples/home%20shop/help/buckle/DSC01330.jpg~original

Wait.... You use it?! :willy:

JRD77VET
05-12-2016, 8:23pm
Wait.... You use it?! :willy:

It's OK, I can resurface it :yesnod:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v78/JRD77VET/Triples/home%20shop/DCP_6134.jpg~original

DAB
05-12-2016, 8:30pm
:rofl:

Might be a little overkill there pardner. 220 sandpaper will suffice nicely.

JRD77VET
05-12-2016, 8:38pm
:rofl:

Might be a little overkill there pardner. 220 sandpaper will suffice nicely.

oh :blush:

I'll put the carbide insert face mill back in the cabinet.

BRB

:leaving:

simpleman68
05-12-2016, 8:41pm
Ironic it happens to have the initial of my first name and screen name. :dance:

Don't want to be greedy though. It's a very nice piece.
Scott

DAB
05-12-2016, 8:59pm
Ironic it happens to have the initial of my first name and screen name. :dance:

Don't want to be greedy though. It's a very nice piece.
Scott

:type:

Entered.

Defib1961
05-12-2016, 10:44pm
We just got married! (Beautiful work as always)

http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20160512/4c0f373a2a8176175e3bb5edab4afd43.jpg

DAB
05-12-2016, 10:46pm
My wife:

"It's a 5, and a 2! That's 52 weeks a year I love you!"

Yes, super lame, but it's better than anything I can come up with. :rofl:

Well, I could personally deliver it to you. On the way to the range.

Entered.

DAB
05-12-2016, 10:47pm
We just got married! (Beautiful work as always)

http://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20160512/4c0f373a2a8176175e3bb5edab4afd43.jpg

Ah, the over-chicked ploy.

Entered.

Black94lt1
05-13-2016, 6:10am
Very nice work and a nice offering to the OT crowd. My last name starts with S, but since I have the Barn Board I'm all set :)

mrvette
05-13-2016, 6:55am
That one I got for my wife, some 3? years ago, she did not use it, just sat on the shelf, so I asked her about sending it to my daughter for a wedding present, and so I saw it on the kitchen counter, well used, fulfilling it's calling in life.....shame they are vegetarians and I can not eat their 'cooking'....

but a neat grandson, so all is forgiven.....:seasix:

xXBUDXx
05-13-2016, 8:00am
Douglas, this is a fine gesture of a kindhearted soul. Much like when my friends and I donate money to one of the local single mothers to help ends meet. Her name is Satin. She dances on the front stage and my friend Mike has tried everything to meet with her ends.

I don't have an "S" in my formal name, buy my wife often calls me "sumbitch" if that helps.

1. My wife and the Sumbitch
2. Mike
3. Sumbitch with Sylvester
4. My family portrait taken as we found out we may not win the cutting board.

DAB
05-13-2016, 8:06am
Douglas, this is a fine gesture of a kindhearted soul. Much like when my friends and I donate money to one of the local single mothers to help ends meet. Her name is Satin. She dances on the front stage and my friend Mike has tried everything to meet with her ends.

I don't have an "S" in my formal name, buy my wife often calls me "sumbitch" if that helps.

1. My wife and the Sumbitch
2. Mike
3. Sumbitch with Sylvester
4. My family portrait taken as we found out we may not win the cutting board.

:rofl:

Pictures worth a thousand words.

Entered.

RedLS1GTO
05-13-2016, 8:16am
Hello Mr. DAB,
I am writing on behalf of my dad. He told me yesterday that there was a wonderful gentleman that he knew from the interwebs who is incredibly talented in the field of woodworking so I had to check it out for myself. With the experience that I posses and the vast knowledge that I have acquired as a 2 month old I must agree. This is beautiful workmanship. Seeing the "S" that is beautifully crafted into this board put a big smile on my face seeing as my last name begins with an S! This would make a gorgeous, as well as extremely useful addition to our newly remodeled kitchen. I do have to confess that there is some selfishness behind this as well. Soon I will be eating solid foods. I fear that my daddy will simply cut things up for me on the table. My hot dogs will taste so much better when prepared with this beautiful board rather than being rolled around on the table. My mama saw this last night and agreed that this was an awesome cutting board that would be used with much love. She also agreed that daddy would probably feed me from the tabletop without it.

We would be honored to have this beautiful piece of functional art grace our kitchen.

Sincerely,
D.C.S.

http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p90/botch1980/20160511_184055_zpshkumckb0.jpg

DAB
05-13-2016, 8:45am
Hello Mr. DAB,
I am writing on behalf of my dad. He told me yesterday that there was a wonderful gentleman that he knew from the interwebs who is incredibly talented in the field of woodworking so I had to check it out for myself. With the experience that I posses and the vast knowledge that I have acquired as a 2 month old I must agree. This is beautiful workmanship. Seeing the "S" that is beautifully crafted into this board put a big smile on my face seeing as my last name begins with an S! This would make a gorgeous, as well as extremely useful addition to our newly remodeled kitchen. I do have to confess that there is some selfishness behind this as well. Soon I will be eating solid foods. I fear that my daddy will simply cut things up for me on the table. My hot dogs will taste so much better when prepared with this beautiful board rather than being rolled around on the table. My mama saw this last night and agreed that this was an awesome cutting board that would be used with much love. She also agreed that daddy would probably feed me from the tabletop without it.

We would be honored to have this beautiful piece of functional art grace our kitchen.

Sincerely,
D.C.S.

http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p90/botch1980/20160511_184055_zpshkumckb0.jpg

He's one helluva typist. :hurray:

Entered.

five-oh
05-13-2016, 8:47am
How do ya freakin' top THAT entry?!? I call foul,Red. Incredibly devious, using the kiddo.....:slap: :lol:
Well...none of the names I've been called by those that love me start with an "S", unless you count "SuperDad".
I can think of many things that start with an "S" from my professional life, but none printable.
Nonetheless, I'd be honored to have such a fine example of craftsmanship, Ishmael. Regardless of the history of the wood it's made of.:D

DAB
05-13-2016, 8:54am
How do ya freakin' top THAT entry?!? I call foul,Red. Incredibly devious, using the kiddo.....:slap: :lol:
Well...none of the names I've been called by those that love me start with an "S", unless you count "SuperDad".
I can think of many things that start with an "S" from my professional life, but none printable.
Nonetheless, I'd be honored to have such a fine example of craftsmanship, Ishmael. Regardless of the history of the wood it's made of.:D

Entered. Barely. :rofl::dance:

Humor, emotion, logic.....even funny pictures.

This is why you took creative writing long ago. :type:

five-oh
05-13-2016, 8:55am
Entered. Barely. :rofl::dance:

Humor, emotion, logic.....even funny pictures.

This is why you took creative writing long ago. :type:

Which is why I'm a Parole Officer, not a best selling author. :lol:

DAB
05-13-2016, 9:00am
Which is why I'm a Parole Officer, not a best selling author. :lol:

at some point, we all find our place in the world. long ago i figured out that politician is not my calling.

:DAB:

this is going to be a lot tougher than i planned. :faint:

8Up
05-13-2016, 9:01am
Obviously 'S' stands for 'sandwich', so will be a nice gift for somebodys sandwich maker.

DAB
05-13-2016, 9:07am
Obviously 'S' stands for 'sandwich', so will be a nice gift for somebodys sandwich maker.

or they win it, and present to said sammich maker, explaining that, and end up with a large "bonk" on their noggin from the hefty cutting board. :rolleyes:

winner can do what they want with it, but prudence would suggest against that approach. :ironchef:

MrPeabody
05-13-2016, 11:31am
Give it to me, and you won't even have to send it to me. I will raffle it off here and all proceeds can go to Island14's family. The winner of the raffle can deposit it in their pay pal account and you can ship it to the winner.:yesnod::seasix:

DAB
05-13-2016, 12:16pm
Give it to me, and you won't even have to send it to me. I will raffle it off here and all proceeds can go to Island14's family. The winner of the raffle can deposit it in their pay pal account and you can ship it to the winner.:yesnod::seasix:

that's one approach. entered.

Stevedore
05-13-2016, 12:51pm
that's one approach. entered.

OK, just to influence this approach a little bit: If this is the winning deal, I will send DAB his $50 stated material cost. From what I can see, DAB has already contributed in Island14's memory; I haven't. So this way, MrPeabody pays shipping (if I understand correctly), DAB contributes his time & skill, the eventual auction winner contributes his/her winning bid, & I cover material cost.

Does this make any sense? Am I understanding everything correctly?

MrPeabody
05-13-2016, 12:57pm
OK, just to influence this approach a little bit: If this is the winning deal, I will send DAB his $50 stated material cost. From what I can see, DAB has already contributed in Island14's memory; I haven't. So this way, MrPeabody pays shipping (if I understand correctly), DAB contributes his time & skill, the eventual auction winner contributes his/her winning bid, & I cover material cost.

Does this make any sense? Am I understanding everything correctly?

I can cover DAB's shipping cost to whomever is the winning bidder.:leaving:

snide
05-13-2016, 12:58pm
OK, just to influence this approach a little bit: If this is the winning deal, I will send DAB his $50 stated material cost. From what I can see, DAB has already contributed in Island14's memory; I haven't. So this way, MrPeabody pays shipping (if I understand correctly), DAB contributes his time & skill, the eventual auction winner contributes his/her winning bid, & I cover material cost.

Does this make any sense? Am I understanding everything correctly?

Stop with the common core math bullshit.

MrPeabody
05-13-2016, 1:00pm
Stop with the common core math bullshit.

:rofl:

DAB
05-13-2016, 1:17pm
:toetap:

I was told there would be no math.

:slap:

I'll stick to what I've laid out.

Winner covers shipping.

If peeps want to send me, or Tim's family, or anyone else money, they are free to do so.

DAB
05-13-2016, 1:34pm
OK, just to influence this approach a little bit: If this is the winning deal, I will send DAB his $50 stated material cost. From what I can see, DAB has already contributed in Island14's memory; I haven't. So this way, MrPeabody pays shipping (if I understand correctly), DAB contributes his time & skill, the eventual auction winner contributes his/her winning bid, & I cover material cost.

Does this make any sense? Am I understanding everything correctly?

as noted above, i'm into this for $25 shipping and $50 materials so far (those are approximate). had to ship it once, they shipped it back and paid for the return trip.

i had planned to add my fee to my gun, ammo, and tool fund, but that will have to wait until i build something else down the road.

DAB
05-13-2016, 8:33pm
No Friday night PUI entries yet?

Mrs. DAB has a favorite.

snide
05-13-2016, 8:38pm
as noted above, i'm into this for $25 shipping and $50 materials so far (those are approximate). had to ship it once, they shipped it back and paid for the return trip.

i had planned to add my fee to my gun, ammo, and tool fund, but that will have to wait until i build something else down the road.

I would have no issue with adding to your fund.

DAB
05-13-2016, 8:52pm
I'm in the middle of building a deck so I can assemble Mrs. DAB's new greenhouses. Then need to tile the master BR so I can then finish and move a new bed. Then I need to build a bowl and cutting board for my sister. Then move my reloading bench. Then I'll have time to make more stuffs for others.

Crap I'm busy in retirement.

I'm also thinking of making a custom board for someone in this thread.

:DAB:

boracayjohnny
05-13-2016, 8:53pm
I ain't got none.
If you gave it to me.
I'd have one.

Yor friend,
Ernest T. Bass
123 Elm St.
Mayberry, NC OU812


The Andy Griffith Show promo - "Mayberry Mysteries: Ernest T. Bass" - YouTube

DAB
05-14-2016, 4:09pm
entries accepted thru tuesday. :type:

Kerrmudgeon
05-14-2016, 4:28pm
I wish one of my names started with S, or 2 or 5 was important some how, but no luck.:(

DAB
05-14-2016, 4:29pm
I wish one of my names started with S, or 2 or 5 was important some how, but no luck.:(

got any friends? you can enter for someone else.

86RAG
05-14-2016, 4:35pm
I'll be needing more firewood this winter, so yeah, enter me up!
















:leaving:

DAB
05-14-2016, 4:51pm
I wish one of my names started with S, or 2 or 5 was important some how, but no luck.:(

http://www.thevettebarn.com/forums/off-topic/97398-happy-birthday-ms-gem.html

i so believe that Sarah has a birthday.....:slap:

Ms.Gem
05-14-2016, 10:23pm
http://www.thevettebarn.com/forums/off-topic/97398-happy-birthday-ms-gem.html

i so believe that Sarah has a birthday.....:slap:
Yes that I do. On that note not sure what I could say other than it's amazing like all the work I've seen you do. I'd appreciate, cherish, and use the hell out of that cutting board.

DAB
05-14-2016, 10:49pm
Yes that I do. On that note not sure what I could say other than it's amazing like all the work I've seen you do. I'd appreciate, cherish, and use the hell out of that cutting board.

Entered. :DAB:

DAB
05-15-2016, 9:23am
entries close tuesday. :type:

Kerrmudgeon
05-15-2016, 10:19am
My brother's name is Stuart so I'll enter for him if it's ok? :thumbs:

CertInsaneC5
05-15-2016, 10:47am
I just used the VB cutting board for a Big dinner (not for the first time) from the auction for Tim's family.

During that whole time, I could hear it telling me that it was not big enough to handle all the food I was preparing on it.

I heard its cries for mercy. I ignored them. Selfishly relishing in my food preparation. My delight in slicing and dicing knew no bounds. The board took it all and asked for more. It struggled under the shear weight of the produce. Barked back at me from the meat cleaver coming down on it. Squealed with delight when I washed it off and started right in again. It begged me to get a relief board. Something to take the load off. Anything to relieve the pressure of my mad chopping and slicing.

It is now resting, somewhat painfully. Still telling me that it needs a friend to help with the huge load of work to be done next weekend. Afraid that the next experience will be more intense than the last.

Please give my cutting board a relief catcher. :D

DAB
05-15-2016, 11:08am
I just used the VB cutting board for a Big dinner (not for the first time) from the auction for Tim's family.

During that whole time, I could hear it telling me that it was not big enough to handle all the food I was preparing on it.

I heard its cries for mercy. I ignored them. Selfishly relishing in my food preparation. My delight in slicing and dicing knew no bounds. The board took it all and asked for more. It struggled under the shear weight of the produce. Barked back at me from the meat cleaver coming down on it. Squealed with delight when I washed it off and started right in again. It begged me to get a relief board. Something to take the load off. Anything to relieve the pressure of my mad chopping and slicing.

It is now resting, somewhat painfully. Still telling me that it needs a friend to help with the huge load of work to be done next weekend. Afraid that the next experience will be more intense than the last.

Please give my cutting board a relief catcher. :D

:clap:

no bad.

entered.

snide
05-15-2016, 11:20am
I just used the VB cutting board for a Big dinner (not for the first time) from the auction for Tim's family.

I'm new to this country and not familiar with the language. If I'm understanding you correctly, you made dinner from an auction? How does that work? :confused5::bigears:

CertInsaneC5
05-15-2016, 11:24am
I'm new to this country and not familiar with the language. If I'm understanding you correctly, you made dinner from an auction? How does that work? :confused5::bigears:


47 minutes to catch it. Man are you slowing down. :leaving:

DAB
05-16-2016, 8:13pm
Just over 24 hours left.

DAB
05-17-2016, 11:35am
just under 13-1/2 hours remain.... :ohnoes:

Fastguy
05-17-2016, 1:17pm
Well, first off, I have the exact same counter, so you know I am a man of great taste.

https://scontent-atl3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/12920375_10207807276333671_2847242224165930623_n.jpg?oh=bc9891032c0a5d282bb4defffdc284a3&oe=57DE307F

My wife's name is Sue, so the S is perfect.
She has decided at 54 years old to start doing fitness shows and has been cutting lots of fresh fruits and vegetables. The cheesy plastic board she has is not up to the task.
She has been working her ass off (literally) and entered her first show in the fall and took third.

https://scontent-atl3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/12038129_10207732710614929_2211889564301904134_n.jpg?oh=53e4c4d082969a81d2df30cc024e7281&oe=57D5BEFA


She is very competitive and didn't like third so she has been at the gym constantly since then. She hired a trainer and has been putting in a lot of effort.
She has been getting ready for a competition that is coming up this Saturday.
I lost track of how many hours she has put in at the gym.
Sunday night, she was running and tripped and hit the ground face first. I took her to the ER and she ended up with stitches on her forehead and a huge black eye that covers half her face. She just cancelled her show because she doesn't want to go on stage with a black eye and a head bandage. She is pretty bummed out having to quit after all her hard work. The cutting board would certainly cheer her up and would get put to good use. We would most likely start a thread of the adventures of the DAB board as well.

Plus, if she doesn't win, she may beat me.

https://scontent-atl3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/10385_969377623155622_267190733131549233_n.jpg?oh=67eacfaa36f791a3ea096f76dd0363bb&oe=57E62ACB


Plus if I win, I will send some unlucky bastard my plastic board which most likely has some sort of sars or something on it by now.

DAB
05-17-2016, 1:41pm
Well, first off, I have the exact same counter, so you know I am a man of great taste.

https://scontent-atl3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/12920375_10207807276333671_2847242224165930623_n.jpg?oh=bc9891032c0a5d282bb4defffdc284a3&oe=57DE307F

My wife's name is Sue, so the S is perfect.
She has decided at 54 years old to start doing fitness shows and has been cutting lots of fresh fruits and vegetables. The cheesy plastic board she has is not up to the task.
She has been working her ass off (literally) and entered her first show in the fall and took third.

https://scontent-atl3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/12038129_10207732710614929_2211889564301904134_n.jpg?oh=53e4c4d082969a81d2df30cc024e7281&oe=57D5BEFA


She is very competitive and didn't like third so she has been at the gym constantly since then. She hired a trainer and has been putting in a lot of effort.
She has been getting ready for a competition that is coming up this Saturday.
I lost track of how many hours she has put in at the gym.
Sunday night, she was running and tripped and hit the ground face first. I took her to the ER and she ended up with stitches on her forehead and a huge black eye that covers half her face. She just cancelled her show because she doesn't want to go on stage with a black eye and a head bandage. She is pretty bummed out having to quit after all her hard work. The cutting board would certainly cheer her up and would get put to good use. We would most likely start a thread of the adventures of the DAB board as well.

Plus, if she doesn't win, she may beat me.

https://scontent-atl3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/10385_969377623155622_267190733131549233_n.jpg?oh=67eacfaa36f791a3ea096f76dd0363bb&oe=57E62ACB


Plus if I win, I will send some unlucky bastard my plastic board which most likely has some sort of sars or something on it by now.

entered.

this is getting to be a tougher decision than i had planned.... :faint:

DAB
05-17-2016, 2:04pm
i'm thinking i'm going to have to narrow this down to some finalists and solicit input from the gang here. :faint:

xXBUDXx
05-17-2016, 3:47pm
i'm thinking i'm going to have to narrow this down to some finalists and solicit input from the gang here. :faint:

It would be easier if you just shipped it to me. :D

snide
05-17-2016, 4:14pm
Draw names from a hat.

DAB
05-17-2016, 10:11pm
About 2 hours and 48 min remain.

I'll review tomorrow and announce the winner.

xXBUDXx
05-18-2016, 7:52am
:waiting:

DAB
05-18-2016, 8:33am
Having breakfast. Will review and decide shortly. :sneaks:

DAB
05-18-2016, 8:59am
i could justify several peeps getting this board, but after re-reading all the entries, and consulting with Mrs. DAB, the winner is:


Hello Mr. DAB,
I am writing on behalf of my dad. He told me yesterday that there was a wonderful gentleman that he knew from the interwebs who is incredibly talented in the field of woodworking so I had to check it out for myself. With the experience that I posses and the vast knowledge that I have acquired as a 2 month old I must agree. This is beautiful workmanship. Seeing the "S" that is beautifully crafted into this board put a big smile on my face seeing as my last name begins with an S! This would make a gorgeous, as well as extremely useful addition to our newly remodeled kitchen. I do have to confess that there is some selfishness behind this as well. Soon I will be eating solid foods. I fear that my daddy will simply cut things up for me on the table. My hot dogs will taste so much better when prepared with this beautiful board rather than being rolled around on the table. My mama saw this last night and agreed that this was an awesome cutting board that would be used with much love. She also agreed that daddy would probably feed me from the tabletop without it.

We would be honored to have this beautiful piece of functional art grace our kitchen.

Sincerely,
D.C.S.

http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p90/botch1980/20160511_184055_zpshkumckb0.jpg

please PM me your address and i'll get this shipped out in the next few days (i don't go to town every day). think i'll give it a quick sanding and fresh coat of finish.

congrats.

i don't have any kids, just one dumb doggie, so i'd like to think this will still be banging around a kitchen somewhere long after i'm done making sawdust.

thank you all to everyone who entered. :hurray:

:DAB:

five-oh
05-18-2016, 9:03am
i could justify several peeps getting this board, but after re-reading all the entries, and consulting with Mrs. DAB, the winner is:




please PM me your address and i'll get this shipped out in the next few days (i don't go to town every day). think i'll give it a quick sanding and fresh coat of finish.

congrats.

i don't have any kids, just one dumb doggie, so i'd like to think this will still be banging around a kitchen somewhere long after i'm done making sawdust.

thank you all to everyone who entered. :hurray:

:DAB:

Totally agree with your choice. I'd have done the same... (but I'm still calling foul) :lol:

Cybercowboy
05-18-2016, 9:24am
You can send it over here so Sandy will quit phucking up my custom chef's knives by cutting food on paper plates. :leaving:

SHE WHAT?

boracayjohnny
05-18-2016, 9:47am
I have it on high authority, Ernest T is mad. "I liked that choppin' board." I last seen him collecting more rocks. Consider yourself warned.

RedLS1GTO
05-18-2016, 10:42am
congrats.

i don't have any kids, just one dumb doggie, so i'd like to think this will still be banging around a kitchen somewhere long after i'm done making sawdust.



:dixie::dixie::banana::banana::banana::party: :party: :party::party::dixie::dixie: :banana: :banana: :banana:

There is no doubt about it, this one will be around (and used) for a loooong time.

This will officially be the first thing that the boy has ever won in his life. (He gets all of the credit here) Kinda cool to think about it like that!!!

:cert::cert:


On a somewhat related note, I did like the idea of auctioning it for Tim's family. I will be donating the original "cost" to that very worthy cause.

DAB
05-18-2016, 10:45am
:dixie::dixie::banana::banana::banana::party: :party: :party::party::dixie::dixie: :banana: :banana: :banana:

There is no doubt about it, this one will be around (and used) for a loooong time.

This will officially be the first thing that the boy has ever won in his life. (He gets all of the credit here) Kinda cool to think about it like that!!!

:cert::cert:


On a somewhat related note, I did like the idea of auctioning it for Tim's family. I will be donating the original "cost" to that very worthy cause.

the original agreement with them was for $275, that included me covering the shipping, so i would have netted about 200. guess i'll have to make something else to replenish my gun,ammo,tool fund. :DAB:

DAB
05-18-2016, 10:46am
got your PP. thanks.

xXBUDXx
05-18-2016, 1:38pm
got your PP. thanks.

I had an uncle that "got my nose" one time, but this is a new one. :leaving:

DAB
05-18-2016, 1:42pm
:skep:

paypal? :slap:

CertInsaneC5
05-18-2016, 1:57pm
Congrats Red! :cert:
Using your boy to rip his heart strings out is cheating BTW. Maybe the kid will hit you over the head with that board later. You rat bastard. :D:leaving:

DAB
05-18-2016, 1:58pm
Congrats Red! :cert:
Using your boy to rip his heart strings out is cheating BTW. Maybe the kid will hit you over the head with that board later. You rat bastard. :D:leaving:

he stuck with the minimal rules i laid out.

CertInsaneC5
05-18-2016, 2:05pm
Your not making this easier for me here.

Now I have to deal with an emotionally scared cutting board. :ohnoes:

DAB
05-18-2016, 2:13pm
Your not making this easier for me here.

Now I have to deal with an emotionally scared cutting board. :ohnoes:

:rolleyes:

so...what was your 'trigger' word? :dance::rofl:

RedLS1GTO
05-18-2016, 2:15pm
I had an uncle that "got my nose" one time, but this is a new one. :leaving:

OK I'll admit it... that one made me laugh. :rofl:

Congrats Red! :cert:
Using your boy to rip his heart strings out is cheating BTW. Maybe the kid will hit you over the head with that board later. You rat bastard. :D:leaving:

He said you could enter for other people. I can't help it that the kid decided on his own accord to enter for me. :D

RedLS1GTO
05-26-2016, 6:07pm
:hurray::hurray::hurray::hurray::hurray:

Look what came for Drew today!

Love it man. Absolutely awesome. :cheers:

http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p90/botch1980/20160526_190313_zpshsz03hwf.jpg

DAB
05-26-2016, 6:11pm
:hurray::hurray::hurray::hurray::hurray:

Look what came for Drew today!

Love it man. Absolutely awesome. :cheers:

http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p90/botch1980/20160526_190313_zpshsz03hwf.jpg

:DAB:

did you find the letter on the outside of the box? :ohnoes:

he's a cutie.

enjoy.

Bill
05-26-2016, 6:30pm
got your PP. thanks.

I remember now why "don't ask, don't tell" was actually a pretty decent Clinton idea.



:dance:









:hide:

RedLS1GTO
05-26-2016, 7:48pm
:DAB:

did you find the letter on the outside of the box? :ohnoes:

he's a cutie.

enjoy.

Absolutely did. This board looked good in pictures. But in person, just... wow. Awesome. Absolutely awesome. I can't believe how beefy the thing is!!! My only fear is that Mrs. GTO uses the thing as a weapon someday! :willy:

Thanks Doug. :cheers:

DAB
05-26-2016, 8:18pm
Absolutely did. This board looked good in pictures. But in person, just... wow. Awesome. Absolutely awesome. I can't believe how beefy the thing is!!! My only fear is that Mrs. GTO uses the thing as a weapon someday! :willy:

Thanks Doug. :cheers:

Well.....don't make her mad. Duh. :slap:

JRD77VET
05-26-2016, 8:35pm
Well.....don't make her mad. Duh. :ironchef:

FIFY

CertInsaneC5
05-26-2016, 8:41pm
Well look at that. It's the perfect size to slice baby meat up on. :D :leaving:

DAB
05-26-2016, 9:12pm
One last important question, is it fancy enough for Master Drew?

RedLS1GTO
05-27-2016, 6:11am
One last important question, is it fancy enough for Master Drew?

I can't even believe you have to ask that. The answer to that one is easy...

Absolutely!! Love it. :cert:

DAB
05-27-2016, 7:55am
I can't even believe you have to ask that. The answer to that one is easy...

Absolutely!! Love it. :cert:

Just checking.

My results on "being fancy enough" have varied.

:DAB:

RedLS1GTO
05-27-2016, 8:00am
Just checking.

My results on "being fancy enough" have varied.

:DAB:

Your results have not varied. Some people are just stupid. :D

DAB
05-27-2016, 8:02am
I won't be taking their calls anymore. :kimblair: