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island14
01-27-2016, 4:14pm
http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2016/01/santa-claus-arrested-for-drinking-and-driving.html



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'Twas the night before Friday, down in Post Falls, when Santa got arrested, for drunken pitfalls. Mr. Claus, a resident of Spokane, Washington, had been drinking at a bar in Idaho before getting pulled over in his PT Cruiser, driving on the wrong side of the road. Police looked at his license, and it became clear that he was the type of person who once thought it was a good idea to legally change his name to Santa Claus.

"It should be noted, while speaking with Santa," the police report reads, "I could smell a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage coming from his breath and his eyes were glassy and bloodshot."

The beard on his chin was as white as his eyes were not, and his little round belly shook like a bowl full of three or four beers — and was large enough to require that the officers use two pairs of handcuffs, per KLXY.

Santa had to pay a $700 fine, as well as dealing with all the local news stations making lots of puns and jokes once they heard he got arrested.

http://pixel.nymag.com/imgs/daily/intelligencer/2016/01/27/27-santa-claus-dui.w913.h913.jpg

Jobaka
01-27-2016, 4:25pm
:Jeff '79: Santa is really not looking all that jolly in his mugshot.

ApexOversteer
01-27-2016, 4:33pm
To the tune of Jingle Bells...

Puking in the snow,
Alongside Route Fifteen,
O' the chunks he'll blow,
like you've never seen,

Blue lights pulling up,
Man, that flashlight's bright,
Lookin' like ol' Santa Claus,
Will be in jail tonight...

Oh! F*ck my life,
Call my wife,
Shit, I think I'm drunk,
Officer is that your face,
Or am I talking to your junk?

F*ck my life,
Call my wife,
Just don't tell the kids,
I've been bad,
Yeah, it's sad,
Santa's on the skids...

island14
01-27-2016, 4:38pm
Did you write that?? :lol:

ApexOversteer
01-27-2016, 4:39pm
Did you write that?? :lol:

I did. :seasix:

It kinda wrote itself really...

Bill
01-27-2016, 5:05pm
He wuz profiled ...DWS...driving while Santa. I mean, really, who has NOT gotten sh*tfaced and driven the wrong way before, especially when you are on vacation?

69camfrk
01-27-2016, 10:55pm
Christmas eve in the drunk tank would piss a lot of people off.....

island14
01-28-2016, 6:27am
I did. :seasix:

It kinda wrote itself really...


Talent man.. you haz it.. :yesnod:

That's a beautiful song! and I'm gonna learn it... :Jeff '79:


:cert:

boracayjohnny
01-28-2016, 7:06am
Christmas eve in the drunk tank would piss a lot of people off.....

:rofl::lol: