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View Full Version : The gift that kept on giving


DukeAllen
12-08-2014, 12:18am
A woman is shopping for a pet as a gift for her husband, but she is concerned that the prices that the Pet Shop are charging are very high. She goes to the clerk and explains her concern. "Well, I have a frog in the back that I can let you have for $50," the clerk says. "$50?" the woman replies. "That seems terribly expensive for a frog.” "Well, this frog is worth it. It's been trained to give blow jobs."

The woman is stunned, but because her husband loves this sort of sex, and because she is not particularly fond of it, she decides the frog might be a good investment. She buys the frog, brings it home, presents it to her husband, and explains its special value. The husband is skeptical, but promises he'll give the frog a try that night.

The woman goes to sleep happily knowing she won't be bothered by her husband that night. She is suddenly awakened by a clatter coming from the kitchen. She goes downstairs and finds the frog and her husband pulling out pots and pans and poring over cookbooks." What are you two doing down here?" she asks. Her husband responds, "If I can teach this frog to cook, you're out of here!"

Kerrmudgeon
12-08-2014, 12:37am
:lolsmile:...:clap:

CertInsaneC5
12-08-2014, 5:26am
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Barn Babe
12-08-2014, 6:25am
:rofl:

Chuck A
12-08-2014, 7:48am
very funny, indeed

DropTheTop
12-08-2014, 9:56am
:lol:

Fasglas
12-08-2014, 10:07am
:rofl:

Blademaker
12-08-2014, 10:49am
:funniest:

Cybercowboy
12-08-2014, 1:51pm
A woman walks by a pet store featuring a colorful parrot on a stand. The parrot squawks "You are an ugly woman!" The woman gasps and hurries away from the store. The next day, after her friends assured her it was just a fluke, walks back by the pet store. Again, the parrot squawks "You are an ugly woman!" This time she goes inside and finds the manager, and tells him she is very upset and wants him to do something!

He insists he'll take care of the matter by having a word with the parrot. It won't happen again.

The next day she saunters by and the parrot squawks "You are a." She stops and says "I am a what?" Parrot says "You know."