Jeff '79
07-02-2014, 8:30am
A woman in labor is screaming profanity at her husband from her hospital bed.
He says, "Hey, don't blame me! I wanted to stick it in your ass but NOOOOOOO, you said that might hurt!"
I spent $5,000 on a boob job for the wife. She was delighted. I spent another $2,000 on a nose job for her. She was ecstatic. I spent $2,000 on liposuction for her and she couldn't thank me enough! But I spend 50 bucks on a blowjob for myself and she goes ****ing nuts!
A mother-in-law said to her son's wife when their baby was born, "I don't mean to be rude but he doesn't look anything like my son."
The daughter-in-law lifted her skirt and said, "I don't mean to be rude either, but this is a puszy.......not a fking photocopy machine."
Dear Dr. Phil,
Recently, I was watching my next-door neighbor's wife sunbathing topless from my bedroom window. As I was jerking off, I turned to notice my wife was just standing there with her arms folded, watching me. Is she a pervert or what?
He says, "Hey, don't blame me! I wanted to stick it in your ass but NOOOOOOO, you said that might hurt!"
I spent $5,000 on a boob job for the wife. She was delighted. I spent another $2,000 on a nose job for her. She was ecstatic. I spent $2,000 on liposuction for her and she couldn't thank me enough! But I spend 50 bucks on a blowjob for myself and she goes ****ing nuts!
A mother-in-law said to her son's wife when their baby was born, "I don't mean to be rude but he doesn't look anything like my son."
The daughter-in-law lifted her skirt and said, "I don't mean to be rude either, but this is a puszy.......not a fking photocopy machine."
Dear Dr. Phil,
Recently, I was watching my next-door neighbor's wife sunbathing topless from my bedroom window. As I was jerking off, I turned to notice my wife was just standing there with her arms folded, watching me. Is she a pervert or what?