If you come to my funeral...

[lspencer534]

Please come dressed in FBI outfits, stand at the back, and not say a word so that my local friends will think I lived a cool double life. K? Thanks.

[slewfoot]

OK

[DAB]

i call BS.

a lawyer with friends? :skep: :toetap:

[DAB]

Well so much for coming there wearing azzless chaps and a cowboy hat. :(

if you were secret service, you could bring a hooker.

[Kerrmudgeon]

Ye ha! :sadangel:

http://memimage.cardomain.com/ride_images/3/2987/1361/32465680027_large.jpg

http://ts3.mm.bing.net/th?id=H.4572753973610250&pid=15.1

[RED-85-Z51]

Id like to leave behind a few Grand so my friends can hire some strippers to sit in the front row of my funeral service...and have them say things like "not big papi"....

[Aerovette]

Please come dressed in FBI outfits, stand at the back, and not say a word so that my local friends will think I lived a cool double life. K? Thanks.

I'm there man. When is it? I need to schedule the day off with my boss. :D

[lspencer534]

I'm there man. When is it? I need to schedule the day off with my boss. :D

I'll give you as much notice as I can....

[DAB]

I'll give you as much notice as I can....

you can't just string us along with all these continuances, we need a pretty narrow time frame so we can plan properly. :rofl::rofl:

[lspencer534]

you can't just string us along with all these continuances, we need a pretty narrow time frame so we can plan properly. :rofl::rofl:

You are full of piss and vinegar today! :rofl::rofl:

[ApexOversteer]

Bullshit.

I'm coming in a full beard, fishnets and a cocktail dress, with a baboon on a leash, throwing myself across the casket, wailing about "MAH BABY-DADDY IS DEAD WHO GONNA GIT MAH BABY'S SHOES NOW!??"

Then I'll hit on everybody at the reception.

You know, a normal day out.

[Ol Timer]

Bullshit.

I'm coming in a full beard, fishnets and a cocktail dress, with a baboon on a leash, throwing myself across the casket, wailing about "MAH BABY-DADDY IS DEAD WHO GONNA GIT MAH BABY'S SHOES NOW!??"

Then I'll hit on everybody at the reception.

You know, a normal day out.

Will this be different from any other day?

[Ms.Gem]

Can't I just run up to your casket in hysertics crying No Daddy No..........Why oh why daddy?






Hope your wife doesn't get too upset. :leaving:

[DukeAllen]

I'll make sure you're represented.
http://mattsko.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/shark-tux.png
:seasix:

[Fasglas]

http://calificare-specializare.ro/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/agent3.jpg

Hmmmmm... Fishnets, eh?

[C5SilverBullet]

Will do.

[slewfoot]

Is there anyway you can end the rain delay and get the race going before you do yourself in?

[LisaJohn]

So we can ride over tomorrow and pick up my vette?

[lspencer534]

So we can ride over tomorrow and pick up my vette?

Well...yes and no. Yes, you can ride over tomorrow....

[BuckyThreadkiller]

I vote for three day beards, eye makeup and floral print dresses.

[snide]

i call BS.

a lawyer with friends? :skep: :toetap:

There may not be any friends, but here could be a lot of people rejoicing.

[LisaJohn]

Well...yes and no. Yes, you can ride over tomorrow....



:lol:

[lspencer534]

There may not be any friends, but here could be a lot of people rejoicing.

Why..thank you! I was at a loss on how to respond to DAB's post (except to point out my Barbie friends), but you did an excellent job. This will be a happy funeral! :hurray::hurray::hurray:

[MrPeabody]

I'm going to notify all the LGBT organizations in the area so they come and honor you for all the pro bono work you have done for them.

[OddBall]

Bullshit.

I'm coming in a full beard, fishnets and a cocktail dress, with a baboon on a leash, throwing myself across the casket, wailing about "MAH BABY-DADDY IS DEAD WHO GONNA GIT MAH BABY'S SHOES NOW!??"

Then I'll hit on everybody at the reception.

You know, a normal day out.

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

[lspencer534]

I'm going to notify all the LGBT organizations in the area so they come and honor you for all the pro bono work you have done for them.

Note to self: "Self, hire professional sniper to "clean" LGBT members at funeral. Also clean MrPeabody."

[Oh-yaa]

Make it in a cool month please. The heat and humidity will be unbearable in a dark suit.

[island14]

Will they be serving food? :island14:

[lspencer534]

Will they be serving food? :island14:

Yessiree! Hogshead cheese, chitterlings, hog jowl, grits, turnip greens with pot likker, pickled pig's feet, pickled boiled eggs, buttermilk, and RC Colas with Moon Pies! Sound good?

[Doug28450]

Yessiree! Hogshead cheese, chitterlings, hog jowl, grits, turnip greens with pot likker, pickled pig's feet, pickled boiled eggs, buttermilk, and RC Colas with Moon Pies! Sound good?

Will this be for dinner or supper?

[lspencer534]

Will this be for dinner or supper?

That would be dinner. Supper is cheese straws, baked sweet taters topped with hand-churned butter, buttermilk biscuits and fig preserves, squirrel (fresh) and dumplings, collard greens, corn on the cob, and fried peach tarts for desserts . Drinks are sweet tea, lemonade, moonshine, scuppernong wine, and banana wine.

After supper, the Miller triplets, Bobbie Sue, Billie Jo, and Betty Ann, will celebrat their 16th birthday with us by giving each other wine enemas. By that time the party will be getting pretty wild, and I fully expect a fight or two to break out, especially if anybody tries to lay a hand on old man Miller's daughters. He's made it clear that they're just for him until they're 18.

You do drink, don't you?

[DAB]

No hummus or veggie platter? :hide:

[lspencer534]

No hummus or veggie platter? :hide:

That's not food...that's what food eats.

[DAB]

That's not food...that's what food eats.

So no sushi either?

What some call bait.

[lspencer534]

So no sushi either?

What some call bait.

Is that another name for jail bait? We'll have plenty of that!

[DAB]

Is that another name for jail bait? We'll have plenty of that!

Fishing bait. What joebuck might find useful.

[carlton_fritz]

http://i43.tinypic.com/sn2dd2.gif

[RED-85-Z51]

Bullshit.

I'm coming in a full beard, fishnets and a cocktail dress, with a baboon on a leash, throwing myself across the casket, wailing about "MAH BABY-DADDY IS DEAD WHO GONNA GIT MAH BABY'S SHOES NOW!??"

Then I'll hit on everybody at the reception.

You know, a normal day out.

Taking style cues from PAnzer much?

[VITE1]

Will you have a Barbie Vette coffin?

[DAB]

ok, enough with the small stuff.

how much are you paying attendees? cash, moola, dollars....?

i have bills to pay too. :slap:

[lspencer534]

ok, enough with the small stuff.

how much are you paying attendees? cash, moola, dollars....?

i have bills to pay too. :slap:

I'm taking everything with me.

[DAB]

I'm taking everything with me.

sweet. have it all converted to cash and placed by your side. right before they button you up, i'll trade you straight up for a personal check. much easier to carry, and i'm good for it, and you can redeem it when you get there. :hurray::hurray:

[lspencer534]

sweet. have it all converted to cash and placed by your side. right before they button you up, i'll trade you straight up for a personal check. much easier to carry, and i'm good for it, and you can redeem it when you get there. :hurray::hurray:

I'm a lawyer. We invented that joke....

[kylebuck]

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view2/1305683/ace-ventura-monopoly-guy-o.gif

after all that will go on... im doing this with your body.

[lspencer534]

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view2/1305683/ace-ventura-monopoly-guy-o.gif

after all that will go on... im doing this with your body.

I wish I could be there to see it!

[island14]

Yessiree! Hogshead cheese, chitterlings, hog jowl, grits, turnip greens with pot likker, pickled pig's feet, pickled boiled eggs, buttermilk, and RC Colas with Moon Pies! Sound good?


On the way! :hurray:


We can close the casket and use it for a serving table.