What do i get my future ex-wife for Christmas?

[DJ_Critterus]

No, we are not on hatred terms and we are on very friendly terms believe it or not.

Somebody suggested i get her something she can drive.

GREAT IDEA!

A pack of golf balls it is!

[lander]

Careful, she might shank you with them.

[DJ_Critterus]

Careful, she might shank you with them.

Nah. Apparently she can drive them straight now. I'll stand in the woods where my ball lands and be safe since she cares more about hitting the fairway, it seems. Hell, sounds like she's a lot better at it than I am. We'll see in DEC if it's not too cold (yes, my family is the only family she has here int he states, so I am flying her here for Christmas). i still can't be mean to her even against advice of what some of my friends say i should do and she isn't being mean trying to fukk me over either. It's not like her to do that.

[Blademaker]

http://shrink4men.wordpress.com/files/2009/12/ex-boyfriend-punching-bag1.jpg

[mrvette]

No, we are not on hatred terms and we are on very friendly terms believe it or not.

Somebody suggested i get her something she can drive.

GREAT IDEA!

A pack of golf balls it is!

Let someone else buy them, that way they not be YOUR balls......:rofl:

[kingpin]

Nah. Apparently she can drive them straight now. I'll stand in the woods where my ball lands and be safe since she cares more about hitting the fairway, it seems. Hell, sounds like she's a lot better at it than I am. We'll see in DEC if it's not too cold (yes, my family is the only family she has here int he states, so I am flying her here for Christmas). i still can't be mean to her nobody what some of my friends say i should do and she isn't being mean trying to fukk me over either. It's not like her to do that.

Her boyfriend probably showed her.


:rofl:






:leaving:

[SteelCityBlue]

hmmm.the only divorce in vette barn history to end amicably.

ok! off to buy powerball tickets.

[DJ_Critterus]

Her boyfriend probably showed her.


:rofl:






:leaving:

Ehhh... not in the picture and no B/F for her. Don't ask me how i know, but I am positive I know the correct info.

[DJ_Critterus]

hmmm.the only divorce in vette barn history to end amicably.

ok! off to buy powerball tickets.

I bought mine. Dude behind the counter guaranteed i had the right numbers. I'm going to chock the shit outta him if he's wrong and i told him that.

[kingpin]

Ehhh... not in the picture and no B/F for her. Don't ask me how i know, but I am positive I know the correct info.

Pics of her lesbian lover?

[xXBUDXx]

I bought mine. Dude behind the counter guaranteed i had the right numbers. I'm going to chock the shit outta him if he's wrong and i told him that.

There is nothing worse than a good chocking.

[lspencer534]

Nah. Apparently she can drive them straight now. I'll stand in the woods where my ball lands and be safe since she cares more about hitting the fairway, it seems. Hell, sounds like she's a lot better at it than I am. We'll see in DEC if it's not too cold (yes, my family is the only family she has here int he states, so I am flying her here for Christmas). i still can't be mean to her even against advice of what some of my friends say i should do and she isn't being mean trying to fukk me over either. It's not like her to do that.

Since I seem to be a lot of peep's "Dad" around here, I'd like to offer my 2 cents worth. "Not being mean to her" does not include flying her to see you and your family at Christmas. You two are divorced. That means it's time to get on with your separate lives; that is what at least one of you chose to do.

Two things: First, it is not fair to her for you to lead her on if you decided to end the marriage. It is equally unfair of her to lead you on if she made that decision. One of you still cares a lot (too much) about the other person. Both of you need to decide NOW WTF you're doing. No good can come of pretending it isn't over. The divorce said it was over.

I'm leery of peeps marrying the same person again. Very rarely does it work out. Very rarely. And if it doesn't work out, there will be some nastiness. And meanness.

[DAB]

i'm not flying anywhere.

and when i do fly, i buy my own ticket.

[GentleBen]

I'm leery of peeps marrying the same person again. Very rarely does it work out. Very rarely. And if it doesn't work out, there will be some nastiness. And meanness.

Well, I had an uncle who divorced his wife. After several years both he and his ex married other people and then subsequently divorced their new spouse. A couple of years passed and my uncle and his first wife re-marry. As you said, they did divorce again. Finally, they figured it out - they loved each other but could not stand to live with each other.

Their solution? They bought adjoining town houses so that when they were tired of each other they had their own space apart. Worked for them. . .

[lspencer534]

Well, I had an uncle who divorced his wife. After several years both he and his ex married other people and then subsequently divorced their new spouse. A couple of years passed and my uncle and his first wife re-marry. As you said, they did divorce again. Finally, they figured it out - they loved each other but could not stand to live with each other.

Their solution? They bought adjoining town houses so that when they were tired of each other they had their own space apart. Worked for them. . .


Re-marrying the same person is like opening the milk in the refirigerator, smelling it and determining it's bad, then sticking it back in the fridge and saying, "Oh, well; maybe it'll be better tomorrow...."

[Bill]

I bought mine. Dude behind the counter guaranteed i had the right numbers. I'm going to chock the shit outta him if he's wrong and i told him that.

Safety first.

http://www.americanfloormats.com/content/product/large/Wheel%20Chock%20600.jpg

[Allan]

* * *
I'm leery of peeps marrying the same person again. Very rarely does it work out. Very rarely. And if it doesn't work out, there will be some nastiness. And meanness.


I worked for a guy that was marrried 5 times. 2 women 2x's each.

During an in-service training, someone called him out and said "Harry, you've put more women in houses than HUD." :rofl: The entire room broke up laughing.

Harry got pissed. Real pissed. He then walked out as he was about to explode. Harry was a ranking officer. :yesnod:

[NEED-A-VETTE]

Since I seem to be a lot of peep's "Dad" around here, I'd like to offer my 2 cents worth. "Not being mean to her" does not include flying her to see you and your family at Christmas. You two are divorced. That means it's time to get on with your separate lives; that is what at least one of you chose to do.

Two things: First, it is not fair to her for you to lead her on if you decided to end the marriage. It is equally unfair of her to lead you on if she made that decision. One of you still cares a lot (too much) about the other person. Both of you need to decide NOW WTF you're doing. No good can come of pretending it isn't over. The divorce said it was over.

I'm leery of peeps marrying the same person again. Very rarely does it work out. Very rarely. And if it doesn't work out, there will be some nastiness. And meanness.

Totally agree with this. :yesnod:

You guys are getting divorced. Time to move on and make your own lives. She needs to find her own way, Deej. I mean...just how long are you supposed to keep this up? For every forthcoming holiday?

If she wants to spend the holidays with family, let her fly out to her own family or they can fly to see her. Not on your dime. You're perpetuating and encouraging an emotional dependency. Not a good scene.

In the end, standing firm with breaking the emotional ties is actually kinder. Playing house, so to speak, under the guise of "it's the holidays" is actually going to cause more harm than good. May even be downright cruel, when all is said and done. It may seem like a kind gesture, but it's going to cause problems down the road.

Send her a Christmas card wishing her a Merry Christmas. Done.

[island14]

http://shrink4men.wordpress.com/files/2009/12/ex-boyfriend-punching-bag1.jpg

This is a nice idea! :seasix:


Even if you both are on good terms, she will appreciate the humor in it.. :yesnod:


:cert:

[island14]

Re-marrying the same person is like opening the milk in the refirigerator, smelling it and determining it's bad, then sticking it back in the fridge and saying, "Oh, well; maybe it'll be better tomorrow...."

Spoke like a true professional :seasix:


I'm guessing in your line of work you have more experiences than any of us gained from your clients divorces.

[ft laud mike]

Nothing, good terms or not, you two as a couple are through, would you give a random stranger on the street a gift?
:cert:

[NCC-1701]

Totally agree with this. :yesnod:

You guys are getting divorced. Time to move on and make your own lives. She needs to find her own way, Deej. I mean...just how long are you supposed to keep this up? For every forthcoming holiday?

If she wants to spend the holidays with family, let her fly out to her own family or they can fly to see her. Not on your dime. You're perpetuating and encouraging an emotional dependency. Not a good scene.

In the end, standing firm with breaking the emotional ties is actually kinder. Playing house, so to speak, under the guise of "it's the holidays" is actually going to cause more harm than good. May even be downright cruel, when all is said and done. It may seem like a kind gesture, but it's going to cause problems down the road.

Send her a Christmas card wishing her a Merry Christmas. Done.



Excellent post...

[xXBUDXx]

I don't know your situation, but speaking from experience, cut your ties and move on. :cert:

[Sea Six]

I don't know your situation, but speaking from experience, cut your ties and move on. :cert:

Excellent advice.


I just LOVE a good tie-cutting gag.

[Broken Wind]

DICK in A Box Uncensored - YouTube

[wesmigletz]

I don't know your situation, but speaking from experience, cut your ties and move on. :cert:

I gotta agree with the above.

[Cybercowboy]

Totally agree with this. :yesnod:

You guys are getting divorced. Time to move on and make your own lives. She needs to find her own way, Deej. I mean...just how long are you supposed to keep this up? For every forthcoming holiday?

If she wants to spend the holidays with family, let her fly out to her own family or they can fly to see her. Not on your dime. You're perpetuating and encouraging an emotional dependency. Not a good scene.

In the end, standing firm with breaking the emotional ties is actually kinder. Playing house, so to speak, under the guise of "it's the holidays" is actually going to cause more harm than good. May even be downright cruel, when all is said and done. It may seem like a kind gesture, but it's going to cause problems down the road.

Send her a Christmas card wishing her a Merry Christmas. Done.

:yesnod::yesnod::yesnod:

[Iron Chef]

If she wants to spend the holidays with family, let her fly out to her own family or they can fly to see her. Not on your dime.

I disagree. I would be happy to buy my ex a plane ticket to see her family.

If her family were in Siberia.

[DJ_Critterus]

Thanks for your advice all, but this thread was meant to be a smart ass little joke and no need to delve deep down into the Dear Abbey archives.

It is what it is between my wife (for now) and me. It was my decision to bring her here for Christmas since I do know how lonely it is this time of year without anybody to spend the holiday with. I've read all of your advice (thanks) and I am sticking with my decision. No, we will probably never get back together whatsoever, but she has been a part of my life for the last decade and I do hate to lose that. I'd rather have a friend at the end and call it a day.

:wave:
/DJ

[tshirts and jeans]

dj.....i agree...she is using you and you are letting her....... this keeps both of you (or at least the one that still cares) thinking that there may be something down the road.......

you are not being mean by not buying her a plane ticket to florida......i am sure that she has friends in texas that she can spend the holidays with......and if she doesn't then she needs new and better friends........living in a military town, i am quite sure that there are folks not getting to go home to family for christmas......

my ex does get my grandgirl and daughters gifts for christmas but he does not get me anything....nor do i want him to.....but we were married 17 years so he does have an attachment to the kids.....

as hard as it may be for you or her .......you are not doin either of you a favor by continuing to do things like this......no matter how sweet or nice she may be.......move on
:sadangel: